Hello all. Welcome back to The Forum, our weekly on-line gathering of men and women who are in, or would like to be in, a Domestic Discipline or Female Led Relationship. I hope you had a good week.
Mine felt slightly more manageable than last week, though the bar for that seems kind of crazy high these days. I've always seen myself as pretty bulletproof where work is concerned, but I'm starting to question that as I move further into middle-age. Admitting your limitations isn't easy.
Which is sort of the subject of this week's post. Since we started Domestic Discipline, we have always formally had in place some kind of self-reporting scheme. As I've discussed, at the very beginning, I kept a notebook in which I tracked each agreed-upon offense, and tallied up the minimum number of swats we agreed to. Over the years, we have tried other systems, like sending her a weekly email or spreadsheet or something documenting behavioral issues. We also have talked about setting aside time once a week to go over my behavior. Honestly, it never seems to stick. Partially, because this annoying thing called "real life" always seems to interfere. For the last several weeks, one of those "real life" issues was a medical issue that was not conducive to spanking. Now that we are starting to emerge from that--having been reminded once again in concrete terms that the only thing worse than getting older is its alternative--I am starting to think about how we reboot. Including getting a real reporting and accountability check-in system going.
There is one obvious impediment to more rigorous self-reporting. While confession may be good for the soul, it is not so good for the bottom of a truly disciplined husband. So, what is the enforcement mechanism? How should she address things when she finds out that he has been less than forthcoming about his bad acts? What about Ronald Reagan's advice to "trust, but verify?" Does she have a way of independently verifying your behavior when it is something she was not there to see or hear? Since at least some of my own behavior problems occur at work, in an ideal world, there would be someone there who would rat me out.
How does all this work for you? Have you implemented a formal reporting mechanism? What happens if you fail to report fully and honestly? Does she have any way of checking up on you?
Have a good week!