Hello all. Welcome back to the Disciplinary Couple’s Club. Our weekly gathering of men and women who are in, or would like to be in, Domestic Discipline relationships.
- agreement that a change is necessary or wife who is determined to bring the change about whether he likes it or not; and
- reasonable expectations, including that DD may be successful in reducing unwanted behavior even if it does not eradicate it entirely
In the past, I’ve shied away from talking openly about this issue that is plainly a part of some DD dynamics. It raises all sorts of controversial psychological and social issues. Oedipal theories. Corporal punishment’s role in non-adult discipline. Manliness and sexuality. It really is a very loaded topic.
I wasn’t really aware of how stressful that was at the time and, in fact, the absence of rules seemed like a great thing. It was only when I stumbled on the Disciplinary Wives Club in my late 30s that something really clicked. The descriptions of men having boundaries imposed upon them by strong-willed wives just really got to me deep down inside. But, I don’t think I consciously associated it with anything maternal. I really needed someone to set rules and enforce them consistently, but anyone would do if they had sufficient presence and authority to make me feel like I am not the one in command and that punishment is inevitable and resistance futile. While the "strict mom" archetype serves that role, so could an aunt, teacher, school principal, or any other authoritarian whose power or position was sufficient to make me submit.
I've also noticed that part of the attraction I have to spanking drawings that include a maternal vibe is the "getting down to business" demeanor and the sense of inevitability it conveys. As we have discussed, certainty of punishment and the futility of resistance are big elements of this for me.