Saturday, July 20, 2013

The Forum: Question of the Week

Welcome back everyone.  Another week . . . another week.  Last week's question was about interest in Domestic Discipline and how it might be affected by societal norms and perceptions.  This week's question is related but comes at it from a slightly different angle:  Does the fact that Domestic Discipline is seen as kinky, weird, something that should be hidden and kept secret, add to your desire to do it? 

For myself, I know that when we first started, there was a delicious sense of daring naughtiness to the whole thing.   And, I have to admit that it has lost some of its emotional edginess over time.  What about you?  Does the enticement of the "forbidden fruit" play a role in your desire for DD?


  1. I think for a long time I thought my desire to be spanked was kinky. My first experience of being excited about being spanked came around puberty when my 18 year female neighbour/babysitter (Cherry) gave me my first otk bare bottom spanking. During that summer she spanked me several more times. In my early teens every time I would masturbate I would fantasize about Cherry spanking me. I found it difficult to ask girlfriends to spank me in case they thought I was weird. My early teen years were frustrating as I really wanted to be spanked but was too ashamed to ask anyone. I then had several spanking encounters during my late teens that helped me to realise that I wanted to include spanking into my relationships. The first was a chance meeting with my sixth class primary school teacher. At the time she was my teacher she was 22 and I was 12. At this meeting at a holiday resort she was 28 and I was 18. We had some lunch together and talked about the school days. I then decided to take a risk and told her that on the numerous occasions that she threatened to put over her knee, I had secretly wished she had given me a spanking. She smiled and said is that right, well perhaps I should fulfil my threats. I can still remember the excitement that I felt as we walked to her apartment. She gave me both a hand and hairbrush bare bottom spanking and invitation to call in again. I called on her numerous times during that holiday. The next encounter came the following year at my place of work. I was doing clerical work and my immediate boss was a woman about 8 years my senior. We got on really well and she treated me like a younger brother. I got into a little bit of trouble one night (drunk & disorderly). When she had heard what had happened she told me she was not very happy and that she wanted to see me after work. I went into her office after everyone else had left. She gave a very maternal style lecture and then to my surprise and absolute excitement she said I've got a good mind to put you over my knee and give you a damn good spanking. I then surprised her by saying I think you should, I deserve a spanking. So Kath gave the first of many spankings over the next several years. My marriage of some 16 years included some spanking from time to time, however it has only really been in the last 8 years that I have really got to experience a real d/d relationship with my current partner who has really helped me to see my need is normal. So much so that at her next book club meeting she is going to demonstrate how to keep your husband/partner in line by giving me a spanking in front of her 5 friends and then offering them a each turn of spanking me. Following my spankings I will then be serving supper for the ladies with the warning that it better be good or I can expect another trip of her knee.

  2. It’s hard to tell what part the forbidden fruit sensation played for me. But I don’t think that much. From the beginning I knew I belonged bare bottom over a woman’s lap waiting for her hairbrush to turn me into a penitent and obedient little boy. With the first women (a girlfriend) who gave me a real discipline spanking the excitement was off the charts. Now with many years of adult spanking behind me most of it administered by my wife some of that immediate excitement has subsided when I get the order to go over. But the fulfillment from it has increased as it has become normal and natural .My wife believes regular discipline of the male is wholesome and necessary and I have come to agree with her. It happens often enough I have a healthy fear of it but not so often to be jaded by it.

  3. Interesting question - I can see how many would be intrigued or excited by the "secret nature" of a disciplinary relationship (especially F/M). However, this is not especially true in my case. The fact that my wife and I do share this "naughty secret" does perhaps add somewhat to our disciplinary bond - we certainly share knowing looks and smiles in public. :-) However, I often think it would be great if this was the socially accepted norm, and we did not keep it all a secret - and post anonymously online. :-) --Al

  4. Just discovered your blog and I have to say, it's really interesting.
    On forbidden fruit, I'd say that that's certainly a part of the package for us. My wife is something of a reluctant disciplinarian, but I think she does like the playfulness that goes with having a "dark secret". We have quite a bit of word play going on most of the time and that's particulary enjoyable when you're with other people. I love it when she gives me an implied spanking threat that only we two understand but that sounds innocent to vanillas!


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