Saturday, March 21, 2015

The Forum - Vol. 82 - Positions

Hi all.  I hope you had a great week.  As is too often the case, my Saturday finds me exhaustend and needing to relax and recuperate but, unfortunately, faced with a pile of work that I was unable to get to during the normal week. Modern life I suppose.

This week's topic is about spanking positions.  Which do you use in your spanking relationship?

There is the iconic "over the knee."  Source of so many DD fantasies and undobutedly the inspiration for many DD relationships. But, is it really effective?

Or, maybe standing up while supported by a chair?

It is a position that seems to yield itself to a much more serious ass whipping than OTK.

Or perhaps on the bed, supported by pillows?

Or some variation on that theme?

Perhaps draped over a chair?

Or for a lucky few, a special purpose bench or similar equipment in a dedicated spanking space?

What positions does your DD Wife typically command?  Does it depend on the implement she is using? Do you find some are more effective than others at getting her point across?

Have a great week!  One last thing: I can sense my inspiratiion for new topics reaching a low ebb.  If you have ideas, please leave a comment or send me an email.



  1. ERGH! Vanilla page again!

    We have a spanking bench, but I also do FDAU (face down, ass up) on the bed. OTK is physically impossible due to his height (6'4") and my height (5'8") there's not enough room for comfort, so I will sometimes sit propped up and have him lay across my lap. Honestly, I feel that over my lap is okay for fun on occasion, but I prefer the spanking bench or FDAU. I get more swinging room, and my arm doesn't tire as fast. Hairbrush spankings are ineffective anyway, so I enjoy the other implements and positions.

    1. Hello all. I must disagree with you, Dan. My GF and I have a about a foot difference in height, but she can sit on the sofa and have me comfortably across her lap with her feet firmly on the floor. We have a Nu-West hairbrush that I ordered about 5 years ago, and I can assure you, after about 50 strokes, I am honestly wanting it to stop, and I'm the one who asked for it. She initially didn't get it, but now takes a certain glee in my kicking and squirming once she learned no real harm is done.
      She likes to have her feet massaged, and her toes sucked. I don't get that, not at all into feet, but I do the best I can to make her happy. She does the same when it comes to spanking me. I may be the luckiest guy on earth.

  2. We've been in search of a method of securing me adequately so that even when I try to writhe around, I can't. We've been using two different height stools, one like a bar stool so it's quite high, tied together to form a spanking bench, but it's far from stable.
    Mistress has decided we'll go back to using our old 'bench', a low ladder. My feet go inside a bottom rung on one side so I can't kick back, and my wrists are secured on a run on the opposite side.
    Thew problem is my feet still touch the ground so if I struggle and push on them, I can still topple over!
    But the sting in the tail now (pun intended!) is that I'm no longer going to be restrained. It's up to me to show self control and hold position as part of our new training regime.
    In the past I've been paddled while bent over a leather stool - which allows Mistress to remain seated on the couch. I've also been caned while face down on the bed, with pillows underneath me to raise my bottom.
    We've tried over the knee paddlings but it's never effective enough.
    Ideally we'd have a proper spanking bench but the question is where to store it when it's not in use?

  3. My wife R loves to spank me in different positions. She finds OTK is alright for warm up spanking but to really get into the "swing" of things she likes bent over the end of the bed on flat on the bed with pillows under my hips. She also likes me standing hands behind my head she says my bottom bounces more in that position and for a deep sting she likes over the sofa back rest or arm rest. The cheeks are tighter and she gets my feet dancing more. In answer to Respecting Mistress I did make a spanking bench that R loves. We set ours at the foot of the bed and appears to be furniture you might sit on while getting dressed. We got the idea from many hotels that have them.

  4. I would like OTK, but my chubby wife's lap is not very big. So I am bent over the bed or over a pile of pillows on the bed which allows my wife to have a very long swing with whatever implement she has handy. I do think, not that I have done this, that bent over a couch back or arm is a good one and erotic.

    1. Baxter, does your wife approve of the use of the word "chubby" to describe her? Be honest now...


  5. Dan

    Anna suggested that it would be good for me to answer this on my own. To be honest there are several positions that arouse me most. At home when it is going to be along punishment session I like being put on the bed kneeling on top of a pile of pillows. legs spread wide.
    The last time is also a moment and place rather than position. Last weekend i went into my office to work. I was alone and very busy trying to meet a deadline. Anna called me to ask what time I was coming home. When i barked at her and we argued, then i slammed the phone down on her.
    Half an hour later she stormed into my deserted office with a thick leather belt in hand. She ordered me to put my hands on the desk and as i did she pulled down my sweats and turned my bottom a new color of red/purple. She didnt speak till she was done when she pulled me up looked me in the eye and said quietly .. " Never hang up on me again!"
    She made her point and well that memory has kept me on my very best behavior.


    1. Hi Peter. I would definitely describe "over a desk" as a position, though the time and place definitely sound unique! While I'm sure it doesn't seem so at the time, the fact Anna can take care of things at work has to be a great thing for consistently keeping you in line.

    2. Were it not for our sons I can tell you that all punishments would be delivered at the time of the offense. Nothing would please me more than to take a paddle to Peter's bottom, bent over the sink as he whines that he didnt want leftovers.
      Seriously, family and daily life do tend to get in the way.

  6. Position is almost entirely determined by implement. Still, despite having an armory of weapons, 90% or more of all spankings are done with a stout lucite paddle across her lap as she reclines against the pillows and headboard of our bed. I am 6'3" tall, she is ....not. However, is he chooses to spank me before going to work in the morning, she will tend to use an "Adam&Gillian's White Lightnin' Switch" on be bend over a high pile of pillows.

    We also have that 'in plain sight' giant wooden spoon with my name on it. She likes to use that on me in the kitchen if I do something there that irks her. She'll just have me bend over the kitchen counter for a few good swats.

    Lastly, on even more rare occasion, she will use a rubber slapper or a leather tawse on me while I'm on all fours. The tawse she'll use from the side. The slapper is very effective delivered downward so the end wraps and stings the underbum crease.

    Still, I have 'gotten it' in every room in our house at one time or another with something for something. We have a pool table and a lucite fraternity-style paddle and I have been both paddled and switched while bent over that pool table more than a few times.

  7. Hi Dan,

    In the beginning most spankings were the classic over her knee with hand and brush. She used a straight back armless wood chair ( which still sits in our bedroom ) Other classic OTK happened on the couch and in the back seat of my SUV . I would be draped over her lap usually leg locked for most of these. She tried sitting up in bed too but these didn't work very well. I thought then and still do that the classic position was ideal for spanking because it created the naughty boy mindset while it gave her clear access to my bottom. But today these classic style spankings are rare.and mostly I am bent over the side to the bed , sink or chair ( bath brush and strap ) or hands on wall sticking my bottom out for the large paddle or cane. I think the change came because she likes to use the bath brush for the beginning of a spanking and OTK can be uncomfortable for her using the bath brush. The most uncomfortable position for me is getting it in the bathroom with the bath brush when I am required to bend over the sink, stick my bottom out as far as i can and stay on tip toes until she is done


  8. FDAU is used for serious punishment. OTK on couch is used for less serious punishment.

    On topics for the future, if they haven't been already covered. What offenses are you most often punished for (and are they part of an agreement listing offenses or are they at the discretion of the wife. If your violation is determined to be serious, what instruments are used and how many times in your best judgment are you struck with each instrument. In situations calling for serious punishment, do you feel you were punished enough and your wife accomplished her objective (to correct your misconduct). If you repeat serious misconduct does your wife increase the punishment or does she tell you punishment is not correcting your behavior and threatens to terminate your DD program..
    Is the DD program we enter into really for the purpose of correcting bad behavior,, or permitting your wife to paddle the hell out of you when you upset her so she feels she has an answer to your bad behavior, or to relieve your guilt for something you did, or because it is an erotic release for you, or is it designed to reduce or eliminate tension in the marriage or for other conditions (e.g. work related), or because the program opens up lines of communications between husband and wife with the use of corporal punishment intended to improve understandings of each others wants and needs, or are you simply masochistic in nature ??? What's in it for you? What's in it for your wife? What have each of you gotten out of DD ? What disappointments have you had as a result of DD.?

    1. Thanks for the suggestions. We've covered some of these, but I will work any new ones in.

  9. Some other possible topics:

    1.Most DD couples know only one or two other DD couples or maybe none. But who ( don't name them) among people you know do you suspect are DD if any and why do you think so?

    2. Did your mother or another family member ever seriously suggest to your wife she spank you or did anyone else ( including former girlfriends ever suggest to your wife she spank you ?

    3. On a scale of 1 to 10 with 10 being all, how much of your need to be spanked do you think is " hard wired" and how much is learned as for example being spanked when young or other experience?

    4. In your relationships have you always been the one spanked or are you a "switch" or someone who once "topped"?

    5. We talk about the pluses of being spanked or disciplined by our partner but what are the minuses or disadvantages?

    6. For those who have been spanked at least once in front of a witness, did you suggest it or your wife suggest it and how did the reality of it compare to the actual experience.

    Maybe one or two of these are worth discussion


    1. Hi Alan. We've hit some of these, directly or tangentially, but I will work in the new ones and rotate others back in. Let's face it, there are only so many really "new" topics. Thanks for the suggestions.

  10. My first experience was across her knees (with my pants on!), but this was promptly followed with a bare-bottomed OTK session - and then, in short order, with an open-air switching and with repeated uses of her hairbrush. Later (after we were married), the kitchen spoon, the martinet, the belt, the rattan cane and the riding crop were gradually added to her assortment of "tools" - all and any of them used at her own discretion...

    1. Needless to say, the OTK position is best suited for her use of the kitchen spoon, the hairbrush or some sort of paddle (as well as hand-spankings, of course!)
      When she uses the martinet, the cane, the belt or the riding crop, the standard positions involve bending over the back of a chair (or sofa) or, else, sprawling on the bed over a couple of pillows.

    2. ...or else kneeling on the floor, with my nose touching the rug and my derrière sticking up while she, standing tall, straddles me and swings the whip, the strap, the crop - and, occasionally, the carpet beater.

  11. Nearly all of my spankings are over her knees. My wife prefers me to go over her knees as she sits in an oversized wooden chair in our bedroom. All of the spankings in this position are given with her oversized wooden paddle. Once she had me lay across the bed with my bottom raised as she used a wide leather belt and once I recall getting a spur of the moment spanking while standing with my pants down around my ankles as she let me have it with a yardstick.
    As far as future topics to discuss –
    - Does your spanking vary with the type of offense committed?
    - Ever get a spanking for several minor offenses combined?
    - Are you able to determine the length of your spanking once started?
    - What are the most serious offenses that guarantee a severe spanking?

    1. Hi Anonymous. Does the OTK with the oversized paddle give her enough room to swing?

  12. Some of you guys must have a tougher behind than I do because my wife doesn't seem to have any problem at all bringing me to tears when she puts me over her knee and applies the hard wood. Now in fairness to the point being made, she seldom uses an ordinary hairbrush. Most often she uses the Vermont bath brush or one of her paddles (all with more impact than a typical hairbrush). We both appreciate the Vermont brush because it looks so much like a large hairbrush - and thereby carries with it the psychological symbol of female discipline - while at the same time having a long enough handle to make for a good swing and a heavy enough head for good impact. I have had some serious butt blisterings with the Vermont brush. It seems to be an almost perfect spanking brush (The Vermont brush used to be carried by the Vermont Country Store and was legendary among spankos - but is now discontinued).

    My wife typically puts me otk while she sits against the back of the bed - we both appreciate the intimacy of the position. For us, while the spanking is definitely real discipline (I am frequently reduced to sobs - even during weekly maintenance spankings) - we still regard it an intimacy that we share (my submission to her discipline), and the position seems to be conducive to a good long paddling as well - I almost never receive less than a hundred whacks. The long paddlings almost always send me into the sub-zone at some point - further adding to the intimacy of the experience, while reinforcing her discipline at the same time. We find that the weekly otk maintenance spankings help maintain the aura of female discipline in the home, even when I have not earned a punishment spanking.

    Because I am much taller than her, the position on the bed, or sometimes the couch, works much better than a chair for us. And as Alan pointed out above the otk position very much carries with it the psychological impact of the no-nonsense wife taking care of her bad boy husband - again accenting the presence of female discipline in the home.

    However, over the years she has experimented with several different implements and several different positions for disciplining me. I have been laid out on the bed and strapped or switched several times, and bent over the back of a chair or the side of table and paddled (strapped or switched) many times over the years. When the kids still lived at home and discretion was necessary, I was frequently "quietly" switched while bent over the edge of the bed. And, like others in the earlier posts - there have been times when I have earned some really serious punishment and been bent over a chair for a good hard paddling with big paddle - and those have been quite effective in making the point that there was a behavior that I needed to fix and now - definitely more painful than an otk spanking, and more suited to a real punishment need than ongoing discipline.

    Anyway - just a few thoughts from our arrangement

    Best to All --- al

  13. Off Topic - Resistance - I was too busy at work to post on last week's topic - but thought I would share a memory from early in our disciplinary lifestyle.

    We had probably been practicing the DWC lifestyle for about 3 months - and with the enthusiasm of beginning converts everywhere, I had been paddled many times during those first several weeks. And although they were all very much disciplinary spankings that usually brought me to tears, I had never "not wanted" the spanking when the time came. Now, I often did very much want it to be over at some point during the spanking, but not before the spanking began.

    Then one Saturday afternoon, I was really in a funk and just generally being a grump - I don't really remember why. But, after a while of this, my wife pronounced that I needed an attitude adjustment - and to go fetch her paddle. For the first time, I realized that I really was "not in the mood" for the bare bottomed butt blistering that was shortly in store for me. I started to object - to tell her that I was not in the mood. Then I realized that I couldn't. And it was not just that I had agreed that she could spank me at her sole discretion for any time for any reason - which I had, and was certainly reason enough. But it went deeper than that - my wife had told me I was going to be paddled, so I was going to be paddled - plain and simple, like it or not. It was like I really just mentally and emotionally had no choice - I had been truly conditioned it seemed.

    And to my wife's credit, she picked up on my lack of enthusiasm - and as I handed her the paddle, she said to me, "Pout all you want, but you've earned yourself an attitude adjustment and a sore bottom - now over my lap. Perhaps that will put you in a better mood." I recall thinking that did not seem likely as the paddling began. She did not cut me any slack - there were tears to spare when she was done. I was still not happy when she finished with me - and she said "I'm sorry if you weren't happy about getting spanked - but you needed it, and I would suggest you get happy about it before you find yourself back over my lap". And after a bit, I found that my mood had improved and the we ended up having an enjoyable evening.

    1. This is rather similar to our own experience. Once it had been establsihed (before we married, actually) that I might be spanked if I "misbehaved", she would ask me if I agreed that a paddling might be in order. Before long, however, she dispensed with this sort of "informed consent", and proceeded to administer "discipline" whenever she felt I "needed" it - with an increasing number of "tools" that I am often required to fetch before (or after) having been ordered to bare my backside in preparation for her "dispensation" of the appropriate punishment...

    2. This is really a defining moment or it was for us when she decides to spank and you really don't want it but have a kind of epiphany that you can't stop it or really resist her when she goes into that " I am in charge here". It actually makes it easier because you don't have to decide anymore if you are going to submit . Interesting to me my wife knew this ( that she controlled when and where) before I did.


  14. Oops - forgot to sign the above post. Hope everyone has a spanking great weekend! --al

  15. As far as the position most used, is he held to the bed posts using leather cuffs attached to stainless chains. Often left in that position for extended periods of time, either prior (to anticipate) or after (to reflect) she administers the spanking. She likes using the restraints, because there has been occasion where I have "run away" during the spanking, if not held down.

    She used to apply the punishment for years using a web type belt, which was quite effective, more so then leather, as the rough cloth material dragged across the skin. In the past few years she often changes over to a "heavy duty" wooden paint stirrer, the kind often used with 5 gal cans. It is about 21" long. Significantly different sensation then the belt.

    When we are planning on staying at a hotel, the belt is usually included in the luggage, as it is more easy to pack. The belt might be brought along for the trip, but is not always used, but I know that it is there if she feels it is needed. Just another reminder to keep me focused.

  16. When we started I would lay on the bed over staked pillows. As we progressed, however, we found that this made it too easy for me to take it, as it were. Now I bend over the bed, with my hands on the bed. I get extra if I twist too much to get out of the way. It is pretty much how I was spanked as a child.

  17. Most spankings are over-the-knee, with hand or implement (hairbrush, slipper). My wife sits on the bed or a chair.

    If she uses the "martinet" (a French kind of flogger) I'm generally kneeling on the bed, butt up and head in a pillow. She may also use that position with the hand or other implement.

    Sometimes I get it "school style", bent over a desk or sofa, especially if using a "paddle".

    Occasionally diaper-style.

  18. My wife uses several positions......a morning spanking is over a pillow on the edge of he bed in front of sliding glass closet doors with mirrors.....I watch my wife spank me......very erotic but I am always hard when she says I need a good spanking. Over her lap is common or over he arm of the couch.

    1. My wife is 5'8" weighs 135 pounds. Her gorgeous legs are extremely strong and she
      takes takes pleasure and enjoys stimulating satisfaction using her magnificent legs
      when spanking me. She makes me lie across the end of our bed and positions me so my
      head is over the side of the mattress. When in place she spreads her bare shapely
      legs and shoves my head between her thighs and locks my neck in an excruciating
      standing scissor hold. As she locks her ankles and tightens the thigh vise she
      makes me place my hands on her calf muscles telling to keep them there until she
      tell me to remove them. If I don't obey and remove them then she will start the
      spanking anew. Having me completely helpless and at her mercy she takes pleasure
      in landing the wooden paddle on my bare rear end until I am crying like a child.

  19. When I got it coming I just shower quick and put a towel on her lap and bend over her lap---and she paddles my bare butt---I am proof a bigger stronger guy can stay over a smaller lap--My paddling hurts but then things are real good between us---It is always consenting---We both seem to know at the same time when a bare paddling is needed--so either one of us is likely to bring it up---She puts up WITH ALOT so i just want it asap

  20. When I got it coming I just shower quick and put a towel on her lap and bend over her lap---and she paddles my bare butt---I am proof a bigger stronger guy can stay over a smaller lap--My paddling hurts but then things are real good between us---It is always consenting---We both seem to know at the same time when a bare paddling is needed--so either one of us is likely to bring it up---She puts up WITH ALOT so i just want it asap

  21. Her preferred position is to have me stretch across a table. She then takes a bath brush with a long handle and spanks until her arm is tired

  22. All mine are otk and if real hard she locks my legs down wirh her right leg


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