Hello all. Welcome back to The Disciplinary Couple’s Club. Our weekly gathering of men and women who are in, or would like to be in, a Domestic Discipline relationship. I hope you all had a great week.
It’s been a difficult, though maybe better than expected, week here. I let you all know that I might be sidelined from posting while dealing with a medical procedure. At the time, I thought the problem was likely to be a lack of interest in posting, because every other surgery I’ve had that involved a general anesthetic had a weird side effect of obliterating my interest in all things Domestic Discipline. This time, that doesn’t seem to have happened. I came out of the surgery feeling more or less like myself.
There is still an impediment to posting anything lengthy, however, which is my very limited ability to use my dominant arm and typing hand. I know I could use my operating system’s dictation feature to pull something together, but I’m not feeling it.
Honestly, I’m feeling kind of frustrated with
being mostly homebound, unable to do lots of simple things easily and medically
restricted from doing lots of others. I'm a pretty active guy, and it's been surprisingly hard to spend an entire week doing little more than reading books and bingeing Netflix. And, there will be several weeks of this, followed by a few months of much more limited mobility than I'm used to. Sigh.
I was originally planning to skip posting entirely for another week, but a while back I’d thought about a simple, concise topic that didn’t require a lot of participation from me, and this seems like an ideal time to use it.
The topic is: Tell us about your most recent disciplinary spanking. Don’t spare us any of the relevant details. What was the behavior that led to the spanking? Where did it happen? What implements did she use? How severe was it? How long did it last? What was her demeanor?mDid she lecture you before, during, or after? How did you feel when it was over?
This topic obviously places the impetus on you, the reader, to provide the content. Hopefully, you will all jump in with lots of comments on each other’s posts. I’ll jump in where I can, but it really is pretty hard to type right now, so my comments may be briefer than usual.
Also, as an aside, I came across a bit of F/m DD-related content I thought I’d pass along. A few months ago, I flagged some posts on the Spanked2realtears blog on Tumbler that comprised a three-part spanking audio story involving a guy being spanked by his single-mother neighbor. The author of the Spanked2realtears Tumblr has been doing a lot of AI-generated content lately. One of his latest is a couple of AI-generated songs with strong F/m DD themes. You should check them out.
I’m not a big fan of AI slop, but AI-generated music is starting to fascinate me. A few weeks ago, I read an article in The Economist (by far my favorite news source) about a weird music trend that has become explosively popular, involving some very perverted, AI-generated country songs. One it highlighted was entitled Country Girls Make Do, by an “artist” called Beats By AI. It’s theme is female masturbation, and some of the lyrics—which are entirely AI produced and performed—had me almost falling out of my chair laughing. I found it on Apple Music, and it’s also on Spotify. Check it out if you have a chance. It is a weird, weird world we are living in.
I mentioned to you before that due to health reasons with female partner my spankings have been same sex variety with a dominate male. No sex just discipline. last week was one of those. Bent over an ottoman and paddled till almost tears.... not quite but almost. Very red and sore for a couple of days.
ReplyDeleteJust curious, but how did you find the male discipline partner?
Delete"Whappz.com" is where I went. lengthy interview process with several gentlemen. We talked about parental feel from disciplinarian and wanted to find one that fit that mold. I am only about 5' 6" tall and a fit 160lb. So, 6' plus was essential. And same age approximately or older. Also, local is another factor. The gentleman that I am be spanked by fit all of those boxes. He has no trouble putting me OTK or over a chair and keeping me there well past my limits.
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DeleteI've read about that website before. It does sound like "the" place to find spanking partners these days, and least for male-male encounters. It seems like that feeling of being kept in place, not just keeping in place yourself, might really transform the experience.
DeleteThat it does!! With no escape possible I am at the mercy of his discretion. It is agreed upon beforehand that there is no option for halting the punishment once begun. I usually cannot sit without discomfort for a day or two.
DeleteThat feeling of discipline being imposed, as opposed to something you control if only by cooperating fully and staying in place, definitely has a big, big attraction for me.
DeleteI received my last spanking on tuesday evening for whining a couple of days in a row. We have been discussing latelly about weekly maintenance spankings, whether it could be something we could do, as my behaviour is mostly good and it’ s hard for her to find a real reason. But the way I enforced the discussion was something that pissed her and she told me that Im defenatelly in need of a reminder. On tuesday evening after the kinds went to sleep she told me to pick three implements and bring it to her so she could give me a lesson. I actually hate to pick the implements myself and prefer that she tells me what to bring. But to choose three meant to me that it will be bad. I choosed a leather belt, a tawse and the cane. After that we went to the basement, I layd on the bench and she started spanking me with the leather belt, hard and intense, around 5 min from both sides, then the tawse and then the cane. The cane broke after second hit, luckily or unfortunatelly, and then she swiched back to the tawse for another 3-4min. It was hard to take and I almost was in tears, but then she finished and told me that was enough. We hugged, kissed, and went back to the livingroom. My bottom was quite bruised, but looked better then I expected. I could stull feel it next day and a bit day after that as well. Today is our first maintanance spanking scheduled, lets see how that goes.
ReplyDeleteI remember well the days when we were first exploring DD and all spankings were in the basement, after the kids were in bed.
DeleteThat is unfortunatelly our everyday, as the kids are still quite young and we have three of them. But our basement is in a separate building and quite private, so works perfectly. Already the word basement works on me quite well.
DeleteSounds like a great arrangement.
DeleteMy last spanking was Thursday morning for not pushing in my chair, which is a small thing, but it really annoys her, so I encouraged her to spank me every time it happens. Her demeanor is always very matter of fact, unless she is really annoyed or angry, which is pretty rare. She doesn't lecture much, and I find it less distracting if the spanking is not interrupted by a lecture. She will usually discuss why I am getting the spanking before it starts. She starts with a quick hand spanking, then she uses a ping pong paddle, which sounds pretty wimpy, but she can spank quite hard with it, and she likes how it feels in her hand. After about 3 minutes of nonstop paddling, I start to get numb. Then she switches to the bamboo paddle, which is more stingy, and cuts through the numbness. We do 2 check ins every week - one on Monday and another on Thursday. Our Monday check in used to always include a spanking, but we changed that, and now I just leave it up to her to decide if she thinks I need one, unless I ask her for one. I find it much more satisifying and meaningful if the spanking is for something real, as opposed to simply maintenance. It is very rare when a week goes by without me getting at least one spanking, and I have recently requested that she intensify our DD in several ways, which she has. She had me make a list of any spankable offenses, and then she added a few more things that bug her. She has gotten better at punishing soon after the offense, and, if we are not home, she tells when I will be getting a spanking, and explicitly letting me know by using the word "spanking", instead of a euphemism like, "you are in trouble" or "that bothers me" Often, reminder spankings for small transgressions have only lasted about 3 minutes. I requested that she extend most spankings to last at least 5 minutes, as she would probably get better results in getting me to change my behavior. Of course, that, and everything else, is completely up to her, and what kind of mood she is in.
ReplyDeleteAnne too has a thing about not pushing in chairs. I personally see it as one of her dumber rules, but it really does annoy her.
DeleteMy last spanking was for disobediance and ignoring her. We had some business in another state but needed to be home by the end of the week. The trip was 500 hundred miles but after taking care of the matter we had to drive back home. The day before we left my attitude had been a little off so she decided to kill two bird with one stone. I got a hard paddeling and a warning to behave on our trip. However, for some reason when we travel I want her attention. On the drive home I became bored and started to get on her nerves. she didn't say much except that I was asking for it. The straw the broke the camels back was a stop to get gas. I had a paper cup in the car from an earlier stop. She had collected all the trash and as I was exiting the car to fill it up she said throw this away but I didn't want to do it till afterwards so I ignored her and shut the door. I didn't think it was a big deal because I intended to throw it away after I filled the tank. She didn't see it that was she let me know I should not have ignored her. It was at that point that I knew I would be getting a spanking. She didn't say anthing when we got home and I unloaded the car and put everything away. When I set down I asked if I had a spanking coming. She said yes but not tonight. We went to bed the next evening she remembred the promised spanking and sent me to get ready for bed and come get in position. Which is my clue to bare my bottom and get on my knees and bend over the sofa next to where she sits to spank me. She used to put me over her knee but her kness is now to bad to have me squriming around on it so now i have to get on my knees and bend over next to her. She does not lecture much but she did remind me of her warning before we left and then she told me that I knew better than to ignore her. I aways get paddled with a Jakori paddle and for some reason it hurts a lot more now that I have lost a bunch of weight. The spanking wasn't particularly severe or long but I was embaressed by the thought of getting spanked for my childesh behavior. The most recent severe spanking I got was for an out burst in a grocery store in front of others. I wanted to get something she didn't agree with and I let my displeasure known in front of another couple. She was embaressed and told me to straigten up. I knew I would be getting it. I just didn't know how hard or how soon. It was one of the few times that I got a spanking right after unloading the groceries. Making an display like that in front of others is a pet peave and I knew better. It was later when we got home so I was sent to get ready for bed but it was clear I was to leave my underwear and pajama bottoms in the bedroom. The paddeling was long and hard and something that I will remember for a while. It wasn't the first time I had been spanked for an outburst and it probably won't be the last but I will think twice before I do it again. I love my wife and I definitly embaressed both of us. It doesn't only reflect on me but on her because we are married so she had every right to give me the blistering I got.
ReplyDeleteGetting to that point where I accept that things I don't think are a big deal will still get me spanked is a challenge for me. Though, it's also those things where my wife tends to overthink things and talk herself out of it. And, like you, I find the childish behavior itself to be embarrassing, not just getting spanked for it.
DeleteFor me, the issue isn't what I think is a big deal, but rather, if she thinks it is. I have let her know that I want her to assert her authority, and to back it up with spanking. Dan, like you, pushing in my chair is not important. However, now it is, because she wants me to do it, and I will often get a spanking if I don't do it. The more she can assume a dominant role, the happier I am.
ReplyDeleteDan, one of the questions you asked about at the beginning of the post was, how do you feel after the spanking? Most of us who contributed so far, including me, didn't answer that question. The main thing I feel after a spanking is a sense of relief, much like after an orgasm. I also feel a sense of gratatude and intimacy. After some time goes by, there can sometimes be a bit of a letdown compared to the intense buildup before the spanking, which is also similar to sex. I am most turned on sexually before a spanking, as DD and sex are closely related, at least for me. It is her having exert her authority that is the most exciting thing for me, and her disciplining me with spanking, and or, corner time, is the result of that. She is well aware of this, and will often remind me about some aspect of our DD to turn me on before or during sex. Not sure how many others are wired this way, but the relationship between DD and sex could be another possible topic to explore.
DeleteSomehow, I'm not surprised that a bunch of guys ignore questions about their feelings. ;-)
DeleteLast Friday night, usual maintenance involving 10 minutes over Mrs GoodLife's knees at bedtime. I did visit a disciplinarian a couple of weeks ago and recieved as part of it my first ever cold caning.
ReplyDeleteSorry, what is a cold caning?
DeleteGoodlife Mickey can probably concur but a "cold caning" I believe is no warmup, just pants down, bent over and several hard licks with a cane. 6 to 12 is the usual number but it can vary. Even horizontal stripes are the goal of the disciplinarian.
DeleteYes, to confirm, where the caning is administered on the bottom without any warm-up. Consequently it is supposed to be more painful. I don't 100% recommend it on its own, it really stung.
DeleteMy last spanking was our usual Sunday maintenance last night. We are going out of town to visit family for the holiday, and I think the paddling was worse than it strictly had to be. She used her “Elinor” paddle, a thick heavy round paddle that is one of her worst. I was warned to be on my best behavior while at my Aunt’s house.
ReplyDeleteMy last real spanking for discipline was about a week and a half ago. I’ve been sick for a week since then, so no whippin’. That one, unfortunately, was the third day in a row I had to be corrected, and for a repeat of a broken rule. When I came into the bedroom that night, I saw her vice-principal paddle setting out. She says it is for when I’m “ bad, bad, bad!” You can imagine being the fourth time over her knee in a week (including maintenance) Wifey absolutely lit my behind on fire. My distress became very vocal… I was not shy about it. Sitting at work the next day was an experience!
Traveling for the holidays is definitely a huge trigger for bad behavior for me. I'm usually tired and cranky and am prone to letting that show.
DeleteYeah, I think breaking the same rule three days in a row would get my wife's attention too.
I feel like it was an overreaction to the crime I committed, but I got a hard paddling with the hairbrush paddle for a combination of not putting the lid on the toothpaste and wasting four eggs by overcooking them. Dan, I know you've talked about hairbrushes like they're not a big deal, but this little paddle is thick and heavy, and I hate that it's the go-to punishment implement. The only thing that gets me through it is reminding myself that eventually i'll go a bit numb.
ReplyDeleteI wouldn't say hairbrushes are not a big deal, but they need to have some heft, and they need to be swung vigorously. Good, heavy ones are hard to find and cost a fortune, so few people have them. I do think they can be used effectively. Though, I do think that for severity, the best hairbrush pales in comparison to a wooden bath brush with a long handle.
DeleteOne of the most severe wooden instruments I've found is a paddle I got on Etsy that has a head that's somewhere between the size of an iconic ebony hairbrush and the typical bath brush but has a handle length that's closer to a bath brush. It's one of the few instruments that can be used effectively OTK and, because of the concentrated head size, actually is even more painful than the bath brush. Here's an example, in a hard (and expensive) wood:https://www.etsy.com/listing/4411027926/vivid-highly-figured-premium-exotic?ref=shop_home_active_1&sts=1&logging_key=83fafcd09d65192fd24c3527dcfcb2fa6e07bf1a%3A4411027926
this is mine and it was less than $20, it's lasted the past 12 years, and I assure you I fear it greatly
Deletehttps://www.woodrage.com/store/p16/OH_Oak_hairbrush_Paddle.html
Sorry I forgot to use initials earlier -JS
I have one very similar to that. And, the price is certainly right. I've pissed away a lot money over the years on paddles and straps.
DeleteI'm so mad at myself. i left the cap off the toothpaste again and now i've been told i'll be doing chores until bedtime and then i'll be getting it. I really don't intend to make these kinds of mistakes. part of me feels resentful because i feel like it's not a fair consequence for what i think is a small mistake, but i'm trying to convince myself that it is fair since I was just paddled for this a couple days ago
DeleteI can understand the conundrum. On the one hand, it *is* a small thing. On the other hand, since it is such a small thing, shouldn't it be easy to fix? I kind of see my habit of leaving doors unlocked in that category and, like you, I sometimes get very mad at myself when I do it again, because it is (or should be) such an easy thing to fix.
Deleteto be fair, i left the toothpaste lid off AND I left an open bottle on the edge of the bathtub, and our cat is known to knock it off. I won't be making those mistakes again any time soon. both last night and htis morning i triple checked that the tooth paste cap was on. That wasn't close to my worst spanking, but it was way worse than I expected, and I was screaming into a pillow for the first minute of it, and I was crying a bit by the end of it. Do I have a low pain tolerance or do you have an extraordinary one?
DeleteI tell ya, I don't know why I asked for this sometimes, haha
-JS
Maybe not "screaming", but there are lots of times I'm hanging on for dear life during the first minute of a hard spanking. I haven't cried, but I don't think it has much to do with pain tolerance. Growing up, I did have an absurdly high pain tolerance, but I don't think that's really the case anymore.
DeleteMy last spanking was yesterday. While I get a few hard swats with the rubber paddle when I forget to do something that annoys my wife, this was the first prolonged discipline spanking I've received in well over a year. My wife let me know a couple of weeks ago, I would be getting 65 swats for costing us $65 to repair something that I damaged due to carelessness.
ReplyDeleteBy yesterday, I figured that she either forgot about it, or just decided to let it go, like she has done countless times over the last couple of years --- in fact, I had resigned myself that any more discussions about her spanking me were a waste of time.
Yesterday morning, she was rubbing my bottom in bed, and I told her how much I liked what she was doing. "You won't like what I'm going to do to this hiney later," she said. "I've decided today is the day you're going to pay for costing us $65."
Later as we sat on the couch watching sports on TV, she informed me that she was going to spread out the spanking into three sessions separated by about a half an hour to increase the intensity. This was due to something I mentioned once, about a spanking being easier to take if it happened quickly all at once, since I would eventually become somewhat numb.
Hours went by, as I began to wonder whether she was going to follow through this time, but she did finally tell me to go to the bedroom.
"You know what to do," she said as she grabbed her favorite implement -- a thick Truro Terror style rubber paddle. That implement has me howling and finding it difficult to maintain position. After 20 or so quick hard swats, I was just starting to learn to breathe through the pain, and it was over. I pulled up my sweat pants and sat my throbbing behind on the couch. We watched sports for another 20 or 30 minutes when she announced it was time for round 2.
This time she grabbed her thick wooden paddle. It's about two and half inches wide and half an inch thick. It hurt more than usual on my already sore backside. My wife concentrated on my sit spots over and over. There was little scolding. She as all business, and seemed to be enjoying herself.
The final round came about 20 minutes later. This time it was the bathbrush on those tender sit spots. She hit the same spot over and over before moving on, and I knew sitting was going to be extremely uncomfortable.
When she finished, we hugged, I thanked her, and she told me to get to work on the kitchen floor while she drank a glass of dark rose that matched the color of my bottom (This was something I talked to her about a while ago as an incentive for spanking). She joked that she probably could have gone with a red wine, and smiled as she watched my red bottom bending and moving as a swiffered the floor and vacuumed the rug.
I'm hoping this will be the first of more to come, but I've raised my hopes in the past only to be disappointed. For now, I just take it day by day.
T-Mac
I'm not familiar with that particular rubber paddle, but we had a heavy rubber strap for a while, and it was absolutely over-the-top excruciating. Hence, the word "had" . . .
DeleteIn the past, carelessness wasn't a big thing for her, even if it cost us money. We started changing that last year, though it was really at my instigation. I felt like there were just too many times that I was not paying attention, doing things thoughtlessly, or taking dumb risks.
I feel the same. And things I do that make me disappointed in myself are ones that I crave discipline for. If it costs us money, my wife is usually on board as well even if she doesn't follow through.
DeleteSame here. Disappointment in myself is at the root of my outsized need to be held accountable.
DeleteMy Last spanking was 2 weeks ago and the blisters from it are just now completely gone. My wife had made a comment about how I had said something insensitive to my daughter and I got defensive and instead of conceding and apologizing I pushed back and said she says similar things all the time. This upset her as I tried to throw her under the bus instead of owning my mistake. She verbally scolded me and I could tell I was in for a spanking later, probably that evening before bed. I decided to go walk off my frustration and went on a hike for 45min without telling her where I was going. This made things much worse as my phone was muted and when I got back to the kitchen, she was very upset. Asked me where I went, why I didnt communicate where I went or answer my phone. She could also tell I had gone on the walk in a somewhat sulky mood.
ReplyDeleteShe immediately told our daughter to go up to her room so she could talk to me and simultaneously told me to go down into the basement and wait for her. I nervously sat on the edge of the couch in the den until I saw her come down with the cane in her hand. She started to lecture me and asked me (rhetorically) to explain my behavior and why I thought it was ok to go on a hike without telling her where i was and not responding to her calls or texts. I tried my best to make my case and minimize my actions which I know I shouldn't have done as it just makes things worse. We both knew I wasn't getting out of being disciplined and that my wife is asking so I confront my behavior and own up to it without defensiveness or an ego. Not that I would actually have some explanation or excuse that would prevent the inevitable spanking. After hearing enough she told me to bend over the end of the couch. Feeling a sense of panic I started apologizing the best I could, which my wife dismissed. In my state of panic I forgot to pull my pants down but my wife came up behind me and pulled my shorts and underwear down around my ankles. As she was doing so she told me the first part of the spanking is going to address the lack of communication and going somewhere without telling her and then she would later address the disrespectful conversation from earlier. I looked back at her and told her sorry again but she told me to look forward and put my face down into the couch and that I would have an opportunity to apologize later.
The first swat of the cane is searing as always and I struggled to hold position as she scolded me about what she expects me to do differently going forward through swat after swat. She had me repeat back to her what her expectations are and what I should not do again. After roughly 30 hard swats and what seemed like forever she paused and told me to get up on my toes for her preferred angle while spanking. She then started to address the conversation in the kitchen and scolding me on why it was disrespectful. She again asked me to explain myself and why I thought it was ok to be defensive and throw it back on her instead of own up to having made an insensitive remark. I knew better this time than to try and explain or justify my actions and I owned up to the ego driven mistake and told her I should not have said what I said and should have simply apologized. The spanking that followed was even longer as she was more upset about this issue than the hike. She scolded me through this spanking in a similar way, which she usually does for what felt like 50+ very hard swats. I was sweating by the end. She then told me to pull my pants up and collect myself and that I would apologize to both her and my daughter. I can tell you I was in a totally different mindset after that. The only appropriate response at that point was "yes ma'am" -DD
"I looked back at her and told her sorry again but she told me to look forward and put my face down into the couch and that I would have an opportunity to apologize later." That's such a strong position on her part! I can almost see the scene in my mind . . .
DeleteDo you think your daughter knew your wife was going to spank you when your wife told her to go up to her room so she could have a discussion with you?
She knew I was in trouble and my wife was addressing it but I don't know if she knew or assumed I would get spanked. -DD
DeleteDan,
ReplyDeleteHope you’re on the road to healing and wishing you a speedy recovery. Happy Thanksgiving to all who celebrate on our side of the pond. I received a thrashing about a week and a half ago. I was insensitive to my wife about a family issue that occurred recently. The minute I said it, I wished I could have taken it back. She gave me that look of disgust and I immediately apologized. She said you deserve a beating. It hit home immediately and brought me back to my youth. I broke a small side window in my Mothers Buick with a rock. My sister ratted me out and my Mother came storming out of the church. She looked at me and said you’re getting a bare bottom beating when we get home. With my wife, I immediately felt flushed. She said to get upstairs now. I obeyed and went to the bedroom. She ordered me to take my pants and underwear off and bend over. She told me she was appalled by my lack of sensitivity and she was going to beat it out of me. I was speechless for once and said nothing. She pulled out the strap and started full bore immediately. The strap struck my bottom and upper thighs over and over. I tried to remain in place and struggled. She must of told me multiple times to stay still and I couldn’t. She said she would start over if I didn’t. Her demeanor was anger and frustration and she took it out on my bottom.
The strapping lasted around ten minutes before she was clearly tired and I was extremely sore. I apologized and told her I loved her and would do better. She left the room and went about her business. This actually hurts a bit more, as she didn’t even want to talk afterwards. I actually felt relieved it was over and felt better after my punishment. The next morning we went for breakfast and she could tell I was sitting gingerly. She said how’s your bottom. I said sore and she said you deserved it. My reply was I did deserve it and that’s the type of punishment I need when out of line. I couldn’t believe I said that to her. She agreed with me and said she needed to up her strictness level with me. I begrudgingly agreed and felt I needed to be punished more often. I opened up a bit more, at that breakfast, about my need for stern strict no nonsense discipline. I must admit I’ve been on my best behavior since then.
T
Thanks! Everything is going well. Just a frustratingly long recovery period.
DeleteAs long as we've been doing this, I don't think we've ever had a situation in which I said something I shouldn't and it resulted in an *immediate* spanking. It's that kind of decisiveness I think Anne should shoot for on a regular basis. It doesn't really surprise me that you told her that was the kind of punishment you needed and that you needed it more often. Although it ebbs and flows, in general I feel like we'd both be better off if she imposed "stern strict no nonsense" discipline much more frequently.
This was one of the few times that she has addressed it immediately with me. The response from her is usually, “I didn’t think of it at the time”. Our DD has definitely ebbed and flowed. I’ve been much better behaved as of late. We rarely address our DD in public, but when she brought it up, I felt the need to reiterate my feelings to her. That innate desire for her chastisement will never diminish in my mind. I thanked her for continuing to make me a better man. She did agree that after a serious thrashing, I’m more affectionate and behave accordingly. She then replies,
Delete“ it will be short lived”. The last thrashing was by far the worst I’ve had in sometime.
T
My wife has also said she often just doesn't think of it at the time, which I admit really puzzles me, given that we've been at this fairly consistently for over 20 years.
DeleteIn the old days, some of our best and most productive discussions about DD seemed to happen over a couple of glasses of wine and a nice dinner out.
My last spanking was last nite. Dev said with the holiday this week she wanted to ensure good behavior on my end. Wasn’t too severe but point was made. JR
ReplyDeleteNot a bad idea this time of year.
DeleteI got paddled again last night she called it a maintenance spanking or attitude adjustment before the holiday. It was long and very severe. It hurt taking a shower this morning so I will remember this one for at least a few days. We have had a lot of discussions around her expectations for me. I told she needs to demand my respect and obedience. There are things we have been.working on but she lets.me get away with too much. I dont start out with the idea of disparaging her but sometimes when she is giving me directions about some behavior I tend to blame her.
ReplyDeleteOr accuse her of the same thing. We are working on my behavior not hers. She reminded me of that last night
Ward, I struggled with this for awhile. My wife is far from perfect. She is at times lazy and lethargic. I’ve reminded myself that it is not about her behavior, but mine. I spoke to her poorly. I addressed her in an insensitive way. This is the reason why I am being punished. I brought DD to her, not vise versa. I look beyond her faults, but certainly do not want her looking beyond mine. I need to be severely punished for my mouth and insensitivity. I agree with you about feeling it fit the next few days. The shower was rough for me the next morning as well. I am glad I’m on my feet at work a lot.
DeleteThere have been a few occasions where I felt a spanking was unfair because it's something she does herself, but it's been very rare. I've always done a reasonably good job of keeping in mind that, as you say, "We are working on my behavior not hers."
DeleteSame here but the fairness argument never works. It just sets you up for her reply of " Yes but you're the one who gets spanked for it!"
DeleteYep she has said the same to me and then always ask if I need a reminder that she is the boss. Sometimes her being the boss sucks especially when I want something and she says no
DeleteThat's definitely where the rubber meets the road in these relationships -- when you've given your spouse the authority of a "boss" but she then uses that power to tell you to do or not do something when you have a strong and opposing desire. To me though, that's when you know the power differential is real and not just a game.
DeleteYes! I hate it when she tells me NO to something want to do and makes me do something I really dont want. I asked her to keep me in line but now I want to take it back when I dont get my way but that will never happen now that she knows that she is the boss
DeleteDan, your comment reminds me of Ms Terrapin's example of her being able to stay out late as much as she wanted, but her husband needed permission. It sounded a lot like a parent / child relationship, where she would say, because I am the mom, that's why. She enjoyed having the authority to spank whenever she chose to, and she needed no other reason than "because I said so". Almost all of us have asked to be disciplined, so it isn't surprising that there is a strong maternal flavor for many of us into F/M DD. It would be great if she would contribute again.
ReplyDeleteYeah, I had hoped she would become a new regular commenter. No such luck.
DeleteMy most recent spanking was this morning, which she said it was to make sure I would be on my best behavior tonight. She gave me a preventative spanking years ago, which I recall, worked well. Looking back on it, I am not sure why there weren't more of them. There has been a history of stressful situations at some previous holiday family gatherings, but not tonight. Because it worked so well for both of us, it seems likely I can look forward to more preventative spankings before other family holiday events. The spanking wasn't unusually hard or long, but I can still feel it now.
ReplyDeleteThe holidays can be stressful. We were with a large group and my mouth got me into trouble again. I made an off color joke, about a younger family member, not getting their act together with a job. My wife gave me “the look”. While we were in another room, she said “you’re getting a thrashing when we get home”. You can’t seem to control your mouth and insensitivity. I told her, I was correct about my statement. She said I should have kept it to myself. Yesterday morning, true to her word, I was off to the gym. When I arrived home, my wife had the straps out. She said to shower and come in naked. I tried to get out of it and she put her foot down and said, “this is what you wanted”. You deserve it and you’re getting it. I replied yes mam. I showered, bent over, and received a thrashing on a semi wet bottom. It hurt bad and I promised to watch my mouth.
DeleteShe continued to thrash me and said, I doubt it. I don’t recommend getting a thrashing just after stepping out of the shower. It’s a different kind of hurt. My wife seems to be back on her game with our DD. It ebbs and flows, but she seems to be taking our conversations seriously and imposing discipline as requested.
T
IMO there's nothing worse than a hard discipline session after a leg day at the gym.
DeleteIt does sound like your wife is back on her game, especially given that she stuck to her guns after you resisted.
This morning my wife informed me that I would be getting a spanking tonight. This is because of my attitude during a discussion with her yesterday. She said that I came across as accusative rather than supportive when discussing an issue at home. Immediately upon hearing this, I experienced an ego hit, and I will likely be docile and penitent today until she says, 'it's time' this evening. E.
ReplyDeleteE. When I came to my wife with DD, this was the main reason I requested it. My attitude, insensitivity and negativeness. She had brought me my ego down many pegs with her no nonsense discipline. As discussed, I hope she continues her no nonsense approach.
DeleteIt is interesting how just the pronouncement that a spanking will be coming works an instant change on our egos.
DeleteI have not posted in a long time, we look at this blog regularly but iI had to relate our latest conflict. We had a group of folks here for thanksgiving . Before our guests arrived I instructed him to avoid any political discussion. Half way through our turkey feast one guest started a discussion thst began with Tucker Carlson. He made some rude comments and I quickly trued to change the topic. I trued again and he talked over me, the conversation got heated and I subtly whispered in his ear “ you are getting the strap” I was so upset, I waited until Friday morning. He is having a hard time sitting today
ReplyDeleteMiss C.
DeleteJust like above, it sounds as if your husbands mouth got him into trouble just like mine.
I’m having a hard time sitting as well today. My wife said, one day you will learn.
Political discussions during the holidays are an easy issue for me in reality though hard in the abstract. In practice it's easy, because my family members are pretty aligned politically, so if political issues come up, it's unlikely to cause a fight. In the abstract, I'm not sure how people should handle it. On the one hand, I get a disciplinary wife telling her husband to avoid political discussions in order to keep a holiday gathering harmonious. On the other hand, it seems like if another guest aggressively injects politics into the discussion, the political discussion is happening anyway -- it's just one-sided and the most aggressive person at the table basically wins by default. I have some extended relatives who are on the opposite side of me politically, and my rule of thumb is I won't initiate a political discussion, but I also won't just sit passively if they inject their partisan points into a conversation.
DeleteThere was no political discussion during Thanksgiving, or for us, at any meal. Even though there is little disagreement politically, we all understand that to even mention the mention of the orange turd, or the sad state of things, can only lead to a downward spiraling rabbitt hole.
ReplyDeleteWe did have a discussion about the possibility of one of our guests introducing an uncomfortable political comment. I thought i was tactful in my attempt to change the topic. Miss C thought i was rude to her and our guest. It has been years since i up set her in public. I was not terribly surprised when I awoke to her tapping me a a wake with the strap in hand. Long deserved scolding followed by the worst strapping in years. This morning still nursing a bruised behind, I get a rare additional strapping.
ReplyDeleteFunny how our wives seem to often have a completely different perspective on our conversations that we do!
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