tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6699266088923868373.post7471885301160087924..comments2024-03-28T21:45:05.911-07:00Comments on The Disciplinary Couples Club: The Forum -- Vol. 120 - Boot CampsDan - A Disciplined Hubbyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01588294648648656600noreply@blogger.comBlogger29125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6699266088923868373.post-56244795510420773722016-02-13T10:07:30.714-08:002016-02-13T10:07:30.714-08:00Good to hear it.Good to hear it.Dan - A Disciplined Hubbyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01588294648648656600noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6699266088923868373.post-19038514256481725292016-02-13T10:04:50.398-08:002016-02-13T10:04:50.398-08:00That's great. See this week's topic on th...That's great. See this week's topic on this very issueDan - A Disciplined Hubbyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01588294648648656600noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6699266088923868373.post-55935638237850816142016-02-12T07:48:53.158-08:002016-02-12T07:48:53.158-08:00Just a quick comment with regard to my own improve...Just a quick comment with regard to my own improved workplace behavior. I work at home and after a good discussion my wife decided to get much more involved in monitoring and following up on my work efficiency.<br /><br />She now reviews an actual time sheet weekly and can, for the first time see exactly how I use my time.<br />Tomy Nashhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06208893789610692117noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6699266088923868373.post-61357155534488702472016-02-11T08:39:04.292-08:002016-02-11T08:39:04.292-08:00After reading about the Boot Camp concept I told m...After reading about the Boot Camp concept I told my wife about it and we had a couple of good discussions about it. I am very happy to report that we have indeed embraced the idea and things are already changing around here; for the better.<br />She decided that rather than do an "extreme" 2 weeks, that I simply had to take a lot more responsibility for making it easier for her to fulfill the DWC wife role.<br />I had always resisted providing her with lists of my transgressions (even thought that's what she wanted). I always felt it was her job to keep track of them and it would be too "unnatural" for me to do it.<br /><br />But now that is changed. She has developed a kind of time sheet for tracking how well I do or do not complete my weekly objectives. Since I work at home, this is actually a very good thing. I have to keep accurate track of how much time I spend on the priorities she has set and give it to her each week (on Sunday night)<br />Also on that report I have to put any incidents that she has called out during the week that should be addressed, (one from this week I am NOT looking forward to was an item of me being impatient and not exactly polite. I have no good excuse either)<br />So the Bootcamp discussion on this forum is making a difference around here.Tomy Nashhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06208893789610692117noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6699266088923868373.post-85350390397988828352016-02-03T07:51:12.456-08:002016-02-03T07:51:12.456-08:00Boot Camp/DWC Intimacy Retreat sounds like a marve...Boot Camp/DWC Intimacy Retreat sounds like a marvelous idea. I have been around the F/m scene for a long time and have never heard of it before.<br /><br />It seems to me that the best thing to do would be make in personalized; each couple planning what would be the best approach for them.<br /><br />The closest experiences I have had to a boot camp, and surely not the same, were weekend gatherings with other DWC couples. And I only mention it because after one of those weekends the disciplinary lifestyle at home was energized for a sustained period of time. Tomy Nashhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06208893789610692117noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6699266088923868373.post-79871889940101358382016-01-27T18:50:24.457-08:002016-01-27T18:50:24.457-08:00Hi Sara. I agree, the dread is part of the attract...Hi Sara. I agree, the dread is part of the attraction. I had an overwhelming sense of that dread the first time I received a DD spanking and was not sure what it would be like.Dan - A Disciplined Hubbyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01588294648648656600noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6699266088923868373.post-64079796936180448832016-01-26T12:35:17.727-08:002016-01-26T12:35:17.727-08:00The part about breaking me down and getting me to ...The part about breaking me down and getting me to dread the next session is scary. And appealing, gulp! saraAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6699266088923868373.post-21701455000512643362016-01-15T16:15:15.988-08:002016-01-15T16:15:15.988-08:00I am going to take the minority opinion on this su...I am going to take the minority opinion on this subject. I think the disciplinary arrangement between husband and wife has to be initiated by one, and agreed upon by the other. In a DD arrangement, the objective is pretty clear cut, to wit, improve bad behavior. The issue, how do you do that? The initiator recognizes he needs discipline to correct behavior he wants to correct. For most of us that means getting spanked/whipped by his wife. The wife, to accept the role as disciplinarian (which involves a lot of work, including a workout spanking her husbands backside), needs to see a benefit for this effort. The benefit in most cases is a husband who improves and makes her life more pleasant and more appreciated. It may also include sexual favors as an added benefit. Whatever agreement that can work for both parties to make it worth the wife's effort. <br /> The next step is doing your homework to find out what works to benefit both parties. The internet is very helpful. The DWC is the most instructive site I've seen, but there are many good supplements. Then communications between the couple is necessary before implementation. Those of us in DD arrangements know bad behaviors must be identified for improvement, thereafter bad behavior must be punished consistently when there are failures, and that punishment must be severe enough (no pain, no gain)to create positive change, and the pain from the punishment should be substantial enough for the husband to want to avoid his misbehaviors going forward. The husband lets his wife know he will accept harsh punishments knowing that is what is needed for him to make progress and knowing it wont kill him. That the buttocks is built to take punishment. The husband should probably encourage his wife to error on the high side (in terms of punishment). From that point on, it involves trial, error, and communications that are specific to the couple (and not what someone else thinks). Following that format, the wife will quickly learn what works and what doesn't and boot camps are unnecessary. If the husband <br />'s behavior improves, the wife knows her punishments are working. If he doesn't improve, she upgrades the punishment meted out until he does. <br /> My wife and I didn't need to follow boot camp steps created by someone else to implement a very effective DD arrangement suitable for us and our needs. My biggest concern now is my fear that I will be able to take the punishment my wife has decided to dish out. That fear keeps me in line, thereafter, for a long time, with very few exceptions. <br /> <br /><br />Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6699266088923868373.post-80028781131139539002016-01-15T14:08:09.920-08:002016-01-15T14:08:09.920-08:00Hi Patricia. Wow -- if you are doing them monthly...Hi Patricia. Wow -- if you are doing them monthly, I understand why Tim might want to give them up! I must say though, while he may not enjoy it, I envy the fact that you are in charge at work and deal with workplace misbehavior. A lot of things I do that really get in my own way happen at work. Temper, insubordination, etc. And the consequences of those things may really be more significant for us in the long-run than something like her getting irritated that I came home an hour later after a happy hour or something. It would be helpful in a lot of ways to have someone actively monitoring and chastising the workplace behavior.<br /><br />Thanks for commenting. Have a great weekend.<br /><br />DanDan - A Disciplined Hubbyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01588294648648656600noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6699266088923868373.post-47485954048865676092016-01-15T14:04:06.149-08:002016-01-15T14:04:06.149-08:00Hi Peter. Great to hear from you. I hope you and...Hi Peter. Great to hear from you. I hope you and Anna and the kids had a good holiday. Your getaways certainly sound like a boot camp, and it sounds like something that would do me good if my wife would replicate it. Periodic enforced humbling would probably do me good.Dan - A Disciplined Hubbyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01588294648648656600noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6699266088923868373.post-4003402937513302052016-01-15T12:14:42.578-08:002016-01-15T12:14:42.578-08:00We never called it boot camp but regular monthly ...We never called it boot camp but regular monthly tune ups of a naughty husband is something we have done for years Tim and I work in our own business and there are times outside our monthly “ meeting” when he requires an attitude adjustment. After business hours, the doors are locked, I sit at my desk, Tim stands beside me, and I lecture him usually about meeting my work standards or showing temper. He is then required to bring me the cane which I use exclusively for work related punishment. He must, apologize for his behavior, and ask me to punish him. Usually he is bent over a chair, with bare bottom pushed out or stands against a wall, bare bottom pushed out .These on the spot sessions take about 30 minutes including his corner-time. Each stroke is hard (fifty minimum and more if he shows any defiance) He is usually balling after a dozen or so. Monthly or as close as possible we arrange to have the house to ourselves for a weekend, or go out of town to a hotel. Tim knows that it is spanking day and he knows what is in store. For these prolonged sessions I use a ritual which is a kind of boot camp. When I am ready, I have Tim come to me underpants in hand as I begin my lecture. The lecture is never the same but it goes something like this. "You know Tim, in the last month I have had to spank you three times. After these spankings, you are very well mannered, so it seems to me that you could benefit from a day devoted to your correction. You are an adult male, but there is a little boy in you that needs to be spanked. Go to the bathroom and bring me my hairbrush." Tim brings the hairbrush, hands me his underpants and I lay him across my lap bare bottom and ready to do penance. I proceed with the brush, making sure that each cheek is crimson red. I use moderate strokes, but lots of them and lots of scolding. The hairbrush lasts as long as my arm can endure. <br />Tim may or may not be brought to tears by the hairbrush, but the day has only started. He will thank me for the use of the hairbrush. We then will likely have lunch, after which I may read or watch television. Tim, meanwhile is required to bring out the cane and the leather belt I like so much. When I am ready, Tim is required to lay on the bed with a pillow under his stomach. I again bare his bottom and I use the belt. I deliver strokes from midway between his knees to the top of his buns. Tim will beg me to stop, cry, and plead for mercy. I only stop when I need to rest. When I am done his bottom is marked with belt lines that look like tire marks. Tim is always in tears by now. If I think he needs extra I use the cane after the belt. When I am done he will apologize to me, thank me for the whipping and then we adjourn for our evening meal<br />There is never any sex the day of a spanking something I have insisted on from the beginning. Depending on how he cooperates with me he can and has earned long periods in chastity in addition to his spankings. We are now at the point where Tim would give up the monthly sessions if he could and that’s exactly why we never will.<br />Patricia <br />Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6699266088923868373.post-71491468750515882382016-01-15T10:42:23.445-08:002016-01-15T10:42:23.445-08:00Dan
Anna & I have a type of Boot Camp from tim...Dan<br />Anna & I have a type of Boot Camp from time to time. They usually occur when I have showed a steady<br />disregard for things we have agreed would stop. Anna will suggest we choose a weekend for the two of us<br />to spend a minimum of 48 hours away from home. For example the last time we borrowed her brother's <br />apartment while he was away on vacation. From the time we entered the apartment on friday after work <br />Anna was in charge. We began with some corner time and then a spanking bare bottomed and then back to the corner. Later at dinner, the dinner i prepared we discussed the problems and then a second session of over the knee.<br />Saturday was Anna's choice. We began the day with spanking then for example we went shopping and I sat quietly as she tried on clothing. Later at lunch we then went to a film then back home where after a bit of warming my buns, I orally serviced her before taking her to dinner at her favorite restaurant. That nite<br />we did have lovely evening in bed. Sunday breakfast in bed as well as time talking. Answering any question she asked. If she felt the answer was an evasion a few swats with a cane brought me around to the right attitude. It was during this session on Sunday she took charge and the final spanking reduced me to tears( first time ) and we went to bed. <br />Like most men i need those reminders from time to time. I do notice Anna taking charge in a way that works for us both. I feel any couple needs to freeform how a boot camp weekend can work for them.<br /><br />peter Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6699266088923868373.post-37746403463967749932016-01-14T11:45:00.376-08:002016-01-14T11:45:00.376-08:00Excellent point!!Excellent point!!sub hub in phxhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17489169642204094414noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6699266088923868373.post-72825343521405430242016-01-14T11:24:10.870-08:002016-01-14T11:24:10.870-08:00Hi Alan. As I understand it, the purposes of the m...Hi Alan. As I understand it, the purposes of the multiple spankings is two-fold. First, by having to give several of them (the guide I saw recommended three per day, with intensity varying from medium to severe), the wife gets more comfortable with giving them. Second, because some of them are intended to be very hard, it is supposed to help her get over any reluctance about hurting him "too much." I guess there is also a third purpose: deepening his submission because, as you say, taking multiple spankings over short periods is very hard to do.<br /><br />Your observation also suggests a good topic for next week. Thanks!Dan - A Disciplined Hubbyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01588294648648656600noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6699266088923868373.post-59189402602954501092016-01-14T07:50:54.638-08:002016-01-14T07:50:54.638-08:00Dan,
This relates not directly to boot camp but on...Dan,<br />This relates not directly to boot camp but one of the underlying themes of boot camp seem to be increased strictness and repeat spankings over short periods. I know some of the worst spankings I have ever received have been double spankings where I have been spanked for two different behavior issues separated only by corner time between the first and second. Almost as bad are spankings within a day or two of the first one. These are both rare for me. I think it has been several years since I was spanked twice in the same week. I am very motivated for several days after a spanking, something my wife is very aware of. This is probably something boot camp accomplishes also.<br />Alan Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6699266088923868373.post-42241011227985141302016-01-14T07:43:18.184-08:002016-01-14T07:43:18.184-08:00Great to hear that things may be getting better so...Great to hear that things may be getting better soon. Keeping my fingers crossed for you.Dan - A Disciplined Hubbyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01588294648648656600noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6699266088923868373.post-9122730115212574002016-01-14T07:42:26.401-08:002016-01-14T07:42:26.401-08:00It certainly sounds like it.It certainly sounds like it.Dan - A Disciplined Hubbyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01588294648648656600noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6699266088923868373.post-78228860567304527172016-01-14T07:25:05.047-08:002016-01-14T07:25:05.047-08:00I believe we did 2. Each was used as a 'reset&...I believe we did 2. Each was used as a 'reset' and involved extended levels of service and frequent punishment. Also, regardless of behavior, there was a daily or twice daily spanking. Bad behavior just meant more. Since I 'can' 'like' a spanking, these were intended to break down any appeal and leave me dreading the next session.........and after a couple of days, that's right where I was. I became genuinely motivated to avoid any trouble, knowing the slightest snark could result in a very unpleasant consequence.<br /><br />It also became a good technique to encourage compliance. It's one thing to cooperate when you know you're guilty and almost want the punishment as much as your leader, but to go over a lap willingly when it's the LAST thing you want, is very good for training submission.<br /><br />Rosa was utterly comfortable with each boot camp. She had no problem delivering one hard spanking after another and liked the results. She seemed to marvel at how compliant I became.<br /><br />I am pretty sure we will probably do another boot camp to re-launch our currently 'on-hold' DD. (I still am submissive to her, and I still follow the rules as best as I can......and my orgasms are still strictly regulated. It's just the punishment part we've sort of mutually agreed to suspend for a bit.) Recent information indicates a hopeful resolution to my current stress-issue in about another two weeks or so. (Hopefully)Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6699266088923868373.post-15067019244587331172016-01-13T20:23:43.270-08:002016-01-13T20:23:43.270-08:00The closest thing to a "bootcamp" experi...The closest thing to a "bootcamp" experience for me is when we visit my sister-in-law at her country home in Burgundy during the Summer. For the "duration" (7 to 10 days, usually), I get an early morning dose of the martinet - from both of them - then have to perform whatever chores they assign me (such as cleaning the toilet, splitting logs for the hearth, etc.) with the perspective of getting the martinet, the strap, the cane or the riding crop if I fail to meet their expectations. (Outdoors sessions with a switch are also an option!)<br /><br />All in all, some "excellent" ways for the two of them to keep me in line... -:)<br /><br />L.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6699266088923868373.post-3945638428691142452016-01-12T17:49:12.044-08:002016-01-12T17:49:12.044-08:00Hi Averageguy. I'm glad to hear you did one a...Hi Averageguy. I'm glad to hear you did one and it was a positive experience.<br /><br />DanDan - A Disciplined Hubbyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01588294648648656600noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6699266088923868373.post-34294277673469602712016-01-11T21:14:18.401-08:002016-01-11T21:14:18.401-08:00Thank you for posting this Dan. We did a bootcamp,...Thank you for posting this Dan. We did a bootcamp, and it was surprisingly helpful and positive for me. There were a number of spankings involved which I was not very happy about, but overall, it was positive. Ive done some independent research on the internet since then, and I have to admit, I am glad we didnt do it as extreme as some people claim! I would be terrified if we did! There were some that were doubtful of the legitimacy of someone who would claim to have done bootcamp on the other thread, so Ill just leave it at that. Im pretty shy about the specifics anyway. But if anyone wants to know a little about how we did it, feel free to email me. averageguy424https://www.blogger.com/profile/17145299619341427100noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6699266088923868373.post-39903293617062242832016-01-10T19:24:05.950-08:002016-01-10T19:24:05.950-08:00Hi Liz! Thanks for dropping by. I wonder if the L...Hi Liz! Thanks for dropping by. I wonder if the LearningDD site isn't accessible from wherever you are, or whether there is a successor site? I can still get to a blog with that title at http://learningdd.blogspot.com. <br /><br />Thanks for the history on the boot camp books. I agree the homework exercises look promising, though we haven't done them together yet. Hopefully, the boot camp won't just become another unfulfilled resolution on my part. If not, I'll let you and Dave know how it goes. Talk soon!<br /><br />DanDan - A Disciplined Hubbyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01588294648648656600noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6699266088923868373.post-80095970606942681252016-01-10T18:43:43.870-08:002016-01-10T18:43:43.870-08:00Hi Dan,
The LearningDD site has sadly been taken ...Hi Dan,<br /><br />The LearningDD site has sadly been taken down. The Amazon link to thier DD Boot Camp Book is: http://amzn.to/1RvqKW2. They originally wrote the boot camp book for couples who had been doing DD for a while to help ingrain each partner's respective role and help those whose DD wasn't where they wanted it to be. A bunch of new folks showed interested in starting their DD relationship with a boot camp so they wrote the Beginner Boot Camp book which is specifically to help new folks learn their respective roles and is a little easier on the spanking end. <br /><br />Dave (my HoH) and I have not done a bootcamp but we've read over the two books and really like the couples homework exercises. Good luck Dan!QuietLizhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12364425377163959292noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6699266088923868373.post-49643583085346117952016-01-10T12:10:14.457-08:002016-01-10T12:10:14.457-08:00Hi SubHub. I agree it could have application for ...Hi SubHub. I agree it could have application for experienced couples, though I also can agree with the skepticism voiced by some commenters. For me, the proof is in the pudding. For my wife, the issue isn't so much concern about hurting me. It is really leading and directing. I am hopeful that a whole weekend of living in that "commander" role would have some benefit.Dan - A Disciplined Hubbyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01588294648648656600noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6699266088923868373.post-22230089274894009342016-01-10T12:07:36.641-08:002016-01-10T12:07:36.641-08:00Hi Anonymous. I agree that in the normal course o...Hi Anonymous. I agree that in the normal course of things, it takes a long time for most disciplinarians to get comfortable with the process. What I hope to find out is whether the "total immersion" of a boot camp would allow them to get more comfortable with it more quickly. Only giving it a try will really tell, but the general principle does make sense to me. It must be hard for disciplinarians to turn it on and off. With the boot camp, at least for a couple of days the goal is to be always on. I would think that has to help reinforce the roles to some extent.Dan - A Disciplined Hubbyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01588294648648656600noreply@blogger.com