tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6699266088923868373.post6892766907324131493..comments2024-03-28T21:45:05.911-07:00Comments on The Disciplinary Couples Club: The Forum - Vol. 195 - Confronting RealityDan - A Disciplined Hubbyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01588294648648656600noreply@blogger.comBlogger44125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6699266088923868373.post-17453454880566640822017-03-31T17:23:15.890-07:002017-03-31T17:23:15.890-07:00My wife added that requirement about stepping up a...My wife added that requirement about stepping up and speaking the truth if I need a session too. AWKWARD! Not something I like or find easy to do. But it's her rules and I consider it just another demonstraiton of my commitment.Tomy Nashhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06208893789610692117noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6699266088923868373.post-56388371389509587682017-03-30T17:35:36.205-07:002017-03-30T17:35:36.205-07:00Hate 'em. Got it yesterday and today...Damn!Hate 'em. Got it yesterday and today...Damn!Tomy Nashhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06208893789610692117noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6699266088923868373.post-81479420524399768732017-03-11T13:24:08.734-08:002017-03-11T13:24:08.734-08:00We have that strap, and it too is one of my wife&#...We have that strap, and it too is one of my wife's favorites. I agree 100% on the Loopy Johnny.Dan - A Disciplined Hubbyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01588294648648656600noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6699266088923868373.post-73319697423885288232017-03-11T02:04:14.440-08:002017-03-11T02:04:14.440-08:00We have a small collection, the black varnished ov...We have a small collection, the black varnished oval paddle from CoCo de Mer was a real favourite of hers for a long time. Fairly light but with a real sting from the get go which built and built to a hot fire. (In)fortunately after many outings it actually broke in action.<br /><br />I was told to replace this and I got a solid oak paddle which I thought she would take to but she finds it jars her hand which is good as it was quite hard to take.<br /><br />The current favourite is the Irish School strap from the excellent London tanners which I have a real love hate relationship with. Hate because it is heavy and really stings, love the afterglow and she finds it easy and (she says) very satisfying to use. It always makes an appearance when I'm in for it.<br /><br />The Loopy Johnny is the opener in my correction sessions - I dislike everything about this, it always feels like a whip with its double loops. I am always 'pleased' when we move to the strap until the first few strokes...<br /><br />We also have a smaller leather paddle which I quite like as it stings but creates a warmth rather than a pain - she quite rightly regards it as much too soft so it rarely gets used.<br /><br />And the latest addition is a lovely, short (22") black cane with a soft handle - very ladylike. Only had one outing as yet, she has found it quite hard to use and says lots of practice needed.<br /><br />As a segue, a new development is that I need to stop being such a coward. I now have to tell her when I think I may need a session as 'she cannot be on guard all the time'. She (apparently) will still take the initiative if she sees me misbehave but I am expected to take the lead more often. Interesting topic potential.<br />TBAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6699266088923868373.post-46144876492470905252017-03-05T06:11:47.731-08:002017-03-05T06:11:47.731-08:00I HATE getting spankings!I HATE getting spankings!Tomy Nashhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06208893789610692117noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6699266088923868373.post-36685458465663925692017-03-04T06:40:33.431-08:002017-03-04T06:40:33.431-08:00As we were turning out the lights last night I was...As we were turning out the lights last night I was informed that I could expect a spanking this morning. And yes, I clearly knew the reason why.<br /><br />So, that's what I am pondering right now.Tomy Nashhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06208893789610692117noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6699266088923868373.post-79551026488716633672017-03-03T18:06:10.522-08:002017-03-03T18:06:10.522-08:00J. occasionally uses "ear-marching" to l...J. occasionally uses "ear-marching" to lead me to the spot she has chosen to spank me, and she (again occasionally) will don her leather boots - mostly when flogging is "in order" - but there is nothing of a "ritual" in the matter...<br /><br />L.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6699266088923868373.post-40530963998009484682017-03-03T12:46:04.654-08:002017-03-03T12:46:04.654-08:00Very interesting development!Very interesting development!Dan - A Disciplined Hubbyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01588294648648656600noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6699266088923868373.post-27801235121776179912017-03-03T12:45:15.069-08:002017-03-03T12:45:15.069-08:00I think of "ear marching" as part of lec...I think of "ear marching" as part of lecturing, and it is not one of my wife's stronger areas, though she is getting better. I am sure taking command and physically dominating like that could be powerful. I am pretty sure leather boots would be counter-productive for me if the goal was to take me to a more contrite place. They are just too much of a turn-on!Dan - A Disciplined Hubbyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01588294648648656600noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6699266088923868373.post-7498634497858444762017-03-03T10:44:09.295-08:002017-03-03T10:44:09.295-08:00Dan,
I think that is as good as it gets with an al...Dan,<br />I think that is as good as it gets with an alpha male, submitting to a spanking even though you hate it. I recall reading Deirdre's much missed blog, she was frustrated with Evan's resistance and discovered that grabbing his ear and scolding him or leading him to a spanking made him much more cooperative. Those kinds of " cues" or " rituals' vary among couples I imagine. But if a wife or girlfriend pushes the right buttons her male partner will become much easier to handle, alpha or otherwise. I know I personally am apparently more responsive to those rituals than others and I know they vary a lot. For example , with one F/M couple we were once in touch with it was leather boots. Those boots just brought out deep submission in him that otherwise was not evident. But they do nothing for me,while being depantzed and marched to the spanking room takes all the rebellion out of me.I am betting every guy who identifies as a spanko has his Achilles heel and finding it will turn him into an obedient little boy ready to be disciplined. Ear marching if you haven't tried it seems to work for many couples<br />Alan Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6699266088923868373.post-41318932532744030072017-03-03T10:14:09.037-08:002017-03-03T10:14:09.037-08:00I know this is off topic but wanted share. All was...I know this is off topic but wanted share. All was going well today. We got things done had a nice lunch. When we got home , out of the blue Dev says " we should take of some maintenance. ". I was caught off guard. It wasn't the hardest spanking she's ever given but held my attention the entire time. She learned that HERE ! Jrhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09387985161853012515noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6699266088923868373.post-39474270465199857642017-03-03T08:11:31.137-08:002017-03-03T08:11:31.137-08:00Hi Alan. No, I don't think I have ever refuse...Hi Alan. No, I don't think I have ever refused to take one once ordered.Dan - A Disciplined Hubbyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01588294648648656600noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6699266088923868373.post-33309275374053992882017-03-03T06:56:02.470-08:002017-03-03T06:56:02.470-08:00Hi Dan
Can you clarify whether you actually defy h...Hi Dan<br />Can you clarify whether you actually defy her sometimes and absolutely refuse to take a spanking ordered?That is very different from resisting, trying to negotiate or delay but ultimately submitting to her.These are two different things and it is not always clear to me which you are describing when you talk about " not taking your medicine" Just an aside, but I think some women enjoy a little bit of rebellion as long as they are ultimately obeyed. Sorry if I am being thick<br />Alan Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6699266088923868373.post-9644449644679520582017-03-02T16:50:02.565-08:002017-03-02T16:50:02.565-08:00Thanks! I spank him because I love him - and I thi...Thanks! I spank him because I love him - and I think he knows it...<br /><br />J.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6699266088923868373.post-50172263165439470782017-03-01T15:37:57.166-08:002017-03-01T15:37:57.166-08:00Or perhaps our C4S siteOr perhaps our C4S siteMerry Contraryhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13605968415958113942noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6699266088923868373.post-35046717648793787512017-03-01T09:23:56.586-08:002017-03-01T09:23:56.586-08:00Hi Fred. I think that's a good way to look at...Hi Fred. I think that's a good way to look at it -- the underlying motivation matters. Our DD began with a focus on her punishing things that made her mad. And, that's still reallly why most actual spankings happen. But, I have asked her to help me get on top of some seemingly perpetual problems. You're totally right that having asked for it, I *should* take my medicine. But, that's all part of the same problem. If I pledged not to go off on management at work, theoretically I would be able to just to do it. But, in the moment, I don't resist the temptation. Same with diet issues. Same with exercise. I make the pledge, but temptation to do something else takes over and I cheat. It's kind of the same with self-reporting. I asked for it. Part of me genuinely wants it, but not quite enough.<br /><br />It's kind of like that quote from Augustine: "Lord give me chastity . . . But not yet." Dan - A Disciplined Hubbyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01588294648648656600noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6699266088923868373.post-29796144543486301642017-03-01T05:45:30.756-08:002017-03-01T05:45:30.756-08:00Loved seeing "J's" little response t...Loved seeing "J's" little response to "L" there. Kind of sweet.Tomy Nashhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06208893789610692117noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6699266088923868373.post-89199380996255916812017-02-28T20:14:40.013-08:002017-02-28T20:14:40.013-08:00I believe the video reference is to those on Spank...I believe the video reference is to those on Spanking Tube: look 'em up under my user name there : FLFUFOMerryslavehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11209310275450354399noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6699266088923868373.post-59356894607359172002017-02-28T13:39:44.074-08:002017-02-28T13:39:44.074-08:00As you did this morning :-)
J.As you did this morning :-)<br /><br />J.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6699266088923868373.post-19207252920154499202017-02-28T13:34:34.375-08:002017-02-28T13:34:34.375-08:00I am glad you see it that way - especially after t...I am glad you see it that way - especially after the strapping you got this morning :-)<br /><br />J.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6699266088923868373.post-75270704028451947502017-02-28T12:51:50.850-08:002017-02-28T12:51:50.850-08:00I agree that there is no need for 'self-report...I agree that there is no need for 'self-reporting' for matters that have no bearing on the way she expects you to behave. But for those that do (and which she hasn't spotted on her own), I will 'confess' - and even offer my backside to whatever punishment she deems appropriate...<br /><br />L.<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br />Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6699266088923868373.post-66975986717241600682017-02-28T12:27:24.977-08:002017-02-28T12:27:24.977-08:00Dan: I agree with you that 'discipline' is...Dan: I agree with you that 'discipline' is most 'real' (and most effective?) when I don't _want_ it, even though I know I probably deserve it. I also have to accept that she decides how (and how harshly) she may choose to deliver what she feels is the "appropriate" punishment... however hard that may be! Yet, I would never challenge her authority - or her "right" to chastise me as she sees fit.<br /><br />L.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6699266088923868373.post-76395536341177290802017-02-28T10:21:24.421-08:002017-02-28T10:21:24.421-08:00For me the issue at hand is what is your DD object...For me the issue at hand is what is your DD objective. Is it to correct behaviors you know are wrong and want to correct? Or, is it to correct specific issues that adversely affect the relationship you have with your wife. If it is the former, I think, if you are serious about making those behavior improvements you should self report and take your medicine. If it is the latter (as is true in my case), then errant behavior that will adversely affect your wife, and in my case, when that happens I will accept my punishment. However, I have no intention of self reporting something she is not aware of that doesn't negatively impact our relationship, but nevertheless was improper behavior. If my bad behavior doesn't negatively impact my wife why should I report it and irritate my wife and burden her. <br /> As a personal objective, I try to conduct myself as a good Samaritan. Yet I may come into conflict with someone that I take offence to and go overboard in taking that person to task. My wife would spank me if I did that in her presence, but if she isn't, why should I self report that. When I'm alone and driving my car, I will cuss at bad drivers. I don't self report that. But if my wife is in the car with me when I cuss at a driver It affects her and I will get spanked. <br /> We have an agreement involving behaviors that impact us, as husband and wife. We have agreed that violations are to be sternly dealt with and she has the authority to determine how hard and long spankings will be to punish those violations. She understands the importance of holding me to my commitments for our common benefit, and spanks hard to hold her end of the agreement.<br /> For us it has worked. I got spanked plenty early on in our DD relationship, but after almost 15 years I have modified my behavior to the extent I rarely violate the rules and the spankings only happen a few times in a year, but they do happen because I occasionally screw up. When that happens, it is a wake up call to refocus avoiding a repeat of that bad behavior. But to this day, I never self report on behaviors that don't impact my relationship with my wife. <br /><br />Fred<br /> <br />Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6699266088923868373.post-89834966166273122782017-02-28T08:07:08.300-08:002017-02-28T08:07:08.300-08:00What posted videos?What posted videos?Tomy Nashhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06208893789610692117noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6699266088923868373.post-39118508904021667482017-02-27T16:42:02.697-08:002017-02-27T16:42:02.697-08:00Similarly, Alan, I was spanked and raised strictly...Similarly, Alan, I was spanked and raised strictly at home. I entered my first disciplinary relationship at 19. So I think the strictness had the opposite effect on me though but in a dualist way: part of me wants the control while another part resents it. Anyway, I think my background conflicts with your theory.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com