Hi all. I hope you had a good week. I noted in the most recent post that I was going to be out doing a bit of adventuring in the latter part of this week.
Well, a little adventuring became quite a bit too much suddenly and unexpectedly. The whole situation looked eerily like this, but worse.
When similar things have happened in the past (though none have been this severe), it sometimes suggested a topic for the blog, usually because the catastrophe resulted from some identifiable carelessness or ignoring a known risk. This time, it just seems like a fluke.
Depending on how things go over the next few days, I might try to write something more about the situation, but I'm going to have to play it by ear.
Have a good week.
Hope recovery is quick, and glad you're at least okay enough to post a note to us.
ReplyDeleteOverall, driving is such a boon to DD, isn't it? It's a rule with a compelling hook (safety), speed and no incidents are easy to measure, and if you're in the car together, she can just glance at the dash to catch you.
When I suggested that speeding be one of our rules and asked where we should set the limit, she was able to throw out a number in a second. Every other rule needed much more discussion for her to agree to it. Speeding is also the only rule for which she broke a hairbrush spanking me.
You're right about the unique combination of compelling hook and easy metrics.
DeleteWhile it's not a passion of mine I understand your passion and the thrill of riding motorcycles Dan.
ReplyDeleteI recently watched the documentary 'Road' about the Dunlops who were Road racing champions .Very compelling and tragic but a great insight into the passion for motor cycle Road racing which is so dangerous , especially the Isle of Man TT .
You can find 'Road' on YouTube and you may want to give it a watch if upu are laid up.
Hoping you have a Speedy recovery.
I'll check that out. I will have plenty of time on my hands for YouTube watching.
DeleteIt was made in 2014 and is narrated by Liam Neeson.
DeleteOh no! Get well soon, my friend!
ReplyDeleteWith the exception of my most recent knee injury, which came from falling down some stairs when I was supposed to absolutely stay off my feet for a few days after a minor foot surgery, pretty much all my accumulated injuries over the years and broken bones along the way have come from riding my dirt bikes. Or technically, I guess it is not so much from riding, but from crashing...
On the plus side, while I hardly remember most of the amazing rides I have had over the years, since they all just kind of blend together, I remember every major crash in perfect detail! So, if it is memories that you are trying to make, you are on the right path...!
-ZM
Believe me, I thought that same thing -- it's the crashes and things like getting stranded in the middle of nowhere that end up forming the permanent memories and giving you the best stories. The bad thing is, I was treating this trip as a sort of "warm up" for several big trips over the summer. I think those plans came to a literal screeching halt. Oh well . . .
DeleteSince it’s an open week , I thought I’d share a recent situation. Last Thursday we were driving on the interstate and I got a phone call. In my vehicle it’s handled through the car but we had hers and I was stumbling with my phone. Texting and driving is a big no no and she told me to put the phone away a couple times but I ignored her and a few words were said. She was quiet for a moment then said “ we will discuss it later “. Well that only means one thing. We stopped at Walmart on way home. I went to the pharmacy area and got this creme with lidocaine in it. ( this numbs the area ). After we got home I put a generous amount on my bottom and waited to be called. Shortly after she did summon me upstairs to the spanking room. She sat there waiting. After a brief lecture she says “ bring me my paddle “ I do as instructed and she pulls me across her lap and the paddling began. The creme worked ! I could tell by the sound that it was firmly given. I could feel it but not nearly as intense as I usually do. The spanking lasted about 10 minutes. Later after the creme wore off I felt the residual effects from the bruising. Dev didn’t catch on. There’s no way I can tell her but dodged a bullet this time. JR
ReplyDeleteThat would be a good black-and-white rule, too. You're driving and you touch the phone; you get a consequence.
DeleteMore than that - you were assessed a consequence (rightly so) but essentially nullified it by secretly using a cream. Keeping it from her (she didn't catch on) is the same as lying to her. You should not be bragging about that. I'd suggest a sincere confession, a repeat of the spanking, and another for the lie.
DeleteI agree that using the cream without her knowing is certainly an act of deception.
DeleteEven so, the spanko in me is intrigued by the cream. One thing that I have noticed over our years of domestic discipline is that the most effective spankings with regard to causing real change of behavior or attitude are those that are long and hard, with the effects felt for days after. Even though this residual soreness is certainly not as momentarily painful as the pain experienced during the spanking, the fact that it keeps taking your mind back to the spanking seems to give real transformative power to the spanking.
However, for a spanking to have these long-lasting effects, the spanking itself must be long and hard. Generally, my wife stops spanking before she would really prefer to because either 1) I start to get spots of blood appearing (not real bleeding, but just kind of small blood drops that get forced to the surface), or 2) it is obvious that the spanking is very painful and she, seeing my distress, decides that I have had enough. Ironically, while I am almost always thankful the spanking has stopped, inevitably I soon find myself thinking or even wishing that it had went much longer.
Which leads me back to the cream. Basically, I am thinking what if my wife put the cream on and then spanked me long and hard (assuming we could find a way to minimize the whole visible damage thing from stopping her early), and I would take it all gracefully, only to later realize that she somehow achieved that whole elusive "you won't sit down for a week" effect?
-ZM
You guys are right. I thought I was being clever but the guilt took over and I fessed up. She laughed and said she thought something unusual when I didn’t act out like usual. She wanted to to see how it worked. I showed her. Creme was applied. Wiped off excess. Dried and soon after it took effect. She paddled again me again the same way. Same length and intensity. She seemed “ impressed “. She had me stand up and she took her belt off and had me bend over the chair. This is unusual as she never uses a belt or strap. When the belt struck the protected areas there was no problem but it wraps around the sides and that hurt a lot ! She made sure to cover the tops of legs too. A while later the effect wore off. My bottom was bruised and was sore quite a while. I apologized and she said the matter is closed. JR
DeleteWell, that doesn't sound good - hope the injuries aren't too severe. Wishing you a quick and complete recovery! --al
ReplyDeleteThank you, al! Complete I can at least hope for. Quick - probably not, unless you're a way more patient person than I.
DeleteYes, from your initial description, despite everyone's best wishes, it does not sound like your injuries will be "fast to heal." Sorry! (I did a combination "knee slam/crush" with "knee twist" roughly 10 months ago, and I'm still having occasional problems. The "insides" of joints are just soooo sloooow to heal).
DeleteDo you have a good (and regular) physical therapist you trust. Makes a big difference as we get older and slower to heal.
Please keep us updated.
Agreed Donn -- the inside of joints get so little blood flow, real healing takes forever. Fortunately, my joints were largely spared in this incident, but I'll be sporting a lot of new hardware to keep parts of bones together,
DeleteI'm sorry yours did involve the joints. Knees are such complicated joints.
Wow. Titanium "screws" and "plates" are serious, VERY serious business. Hopefully everything is either totally inside, or totally outside, so you don't have to worry about infection.
Delete(A couple of weeks ago I saw the after surgery x-rays of Lindsey Vonn's lower-left leg. She had so much hardware inside, outside and penetrating holding together those five (5!) separate pieces of her tibia!)
BTW: My knee was not the result of motorcycling. I was helping a neighbor move a combo (over/under) washer-dryer up a flight of stairs. He and his father lost control near the top, so I ended up running down the stair backwards trying to avoid those +400 pound of steel. Needless to say, it got me!
Totally inside, other than the external leg brace that is locked in zero degree position to keep the leg straight and unbending. I was told by a couple of the docs that my injury is basically the same as Lindsey Vonn's, though I think there are fewer separate pieces to mine.
DeleteOuch! Yours sounds awful. And, in some ways it's a better story. One of those common, everyday things that can take you out.
Wish you a speedy recovery TG
ReplyDeleteThanks!
DeleteDan,
ReplyDeleteVery sorry about the accident. I hope you are well soon.
Alan
Thanks, Alan!
DeleteDan, sorry you had what seems to be a pretty serious accident. While you did say it was just a fluke, and not because of carelessness, it does remind me of earlier conversations we had about how much risk we were willing to take on, and when it was prudent to slow down. That is something that each individual must decide for themselves, but it also could involve a disciplinary wife, or partner, who might have her own ideas. Mine expressed her wishes clearly, and while she left it up to me, I listened to her concerns, and eventually, acted on them. Part of being male is that we tend to take more risk than females generally do, and probably have many more accidents because of that. We drink more, get in more fights, and often act impulsively than women do, which is why there so many more males in prison than females. A possible future topic could be "how much does DD influence the amount of risk you take on?" Another slightly different way of putting that could be "how much do you allow her to limit what she considers dangerous behavior?"
ReplyDeleteIt is a point I have mulled a bit, i.e. whether participating in some hobbies that involve some inherent risk is itself careless, including this most recent incident. The issue is, of course, where to draw the lines. For example, while Anne has *not* pushed that I consider giving up motorcycles (or at least adventure riding), one of my adult kids has gone there. But, this same daughter encourages me continue skiing as I approach my 60s. Yet, the injury I got on the motorcycle is also a risk of skiing. In fact, I'd bet that *more* skiers sustain serious injuries similar to mine than do adventure motorcyclists. An even more glaring example is the injury Anne got a couple of years ago that resulted in 10 weeks of virtual bed rest and months of recovery. Although the root cause was a congenital hip problem that required a very substantial ortho procedure to fix, the immediate cause was . . . pickle ball! I've now had significant surgeries for all four limbs, and the causes were: (a) weight lifting in the gym, when something slipped and caused a tear; (b) getting tossed off a motorcycle onto my shoulder, resulting in a tear; (c) a joint replacement that had nothing to do with any injury; and (d) this latest incident. And, over the course of my life, I've hurt myself riding motorcycles, I've hurt myself riding horses, I've hurt myself skiing, I've hurt myself falling down hiking.
DeleteThe point I'm making is, the severity of injury sometimes has very little correlation with the theoretical "risk" of the activity, and if I were making decisions based on things like past causes of significant injuries, the first thing I'd probably give up is working out in the gym, as I've hurt myself repeatedly doing that, including one significant surgery. Yet, I also know that giving up on those workouts would, over time, result in *more* physical decline and eventual injuries, not less.
So, am I contemplating giving up motorcycles? No. Might I adjust the style of riding? I doubt I would give up adventure riding, but I might scale down the level of adventure a bit. And, ironically, I bought the motorcycle I was on so I could do more solo trips, and I am not seriously reconsidering significant solo rides. But, again, the danger of such trips depends a lot on route choice, staying off of "expert only" trails and out of very isolated terrain.
I could do a topic along those lines. Probably won't be for several days. I'm still pretty doped up and, while not so loopy that I can't write (obviously), the drugs make me awfully lazy.
Dan, we are in very different places in our lives. You are almost 60, and I am almost 80. At this stage, we have friends that have died and many more that are dealing with cancer and other serious types of illness. That's just the reality of where we are now. I don't know if I would have given up motorcycles in my 50s or 60s either, but I wasn't even aware of DD back then. Something we have in common, besides our mutual love of motorbikes, is our appreciation of a maternal style of DD. For me, that means she has the authority to limit behavior that she considers dangerous or potentially harmful. She now has much more authority than when we first got together, and it works well for me. Aside from acknowledging the reality that each couple must decide for themselves how much authority she has, I don't know what else there may be to say about it for a possible topic.
ReplyDeleteYuk! Best wishes for your recovery. Graham
ReplyDeleteSorry to hear about your troubles, Dan - maybe video games would be safer? :).
ReplyDeleteI’m interested in others view’s & experiences of how to re-kindle DD after ( for us) a long break. Life has very much gotten in the way this year with family upheaval, health issues, etc with the result that for the first time in c. 15 years, DD has been virtually non-existent. We have gone from a regular spanking routine of about once every 7 -10 days to probably twice since beginning of the year.
For various reasons I have had to be more of a leader in our relationship and we seem to have reverted back to very traditional roles. She has started to talk about wanting more control again but it feels difficult to take the first step. If I’m honest, a part of me is enjoying the changed dynamic whilst another part craves the structure, discipline & accountability of our DD lifestyle.
Anyone else been through this kind of change and how did you move forward? TB