Saturday, November 9, 2013

The Forum - Question of the Week 26

Hello all.  Welcome to this week's Forum.  Last week we talked a little bit about how, and why, otherwise dominant men become the disciplined party in a DD relationship.  A few of the comments seemed to to say, expressly or implicitly, that once their significant other got into the swing of things--so to speak--it may have become a bit more than they bargained for.   I do not mean just the spanking itself. Rather, the entire commitment to submit to someone else.

The question I am getting at is, once you commit to submitting to being disciplined, does it ever seem too hard?  "It" may be the spankings themselves or, more broadly, the effort and vulnerability inherent in submitting to another's authority.  I have always seen this--the extent to which you do not really want to give in to another's will or take a spanking even when you do not think you deserve one--as one way to assess whether what you are doing is really about "discipline" versus something that is more sexual in terms of its driving force or motivation.

What are your thoughts?  Does it ever just become too much?  Do you ever regret the decision to subject yourself to a full DD lifestyle?

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9 comments:

  1. Most of the spanking I receive from my wife R, cover the erotic area. However she has been given the right to punish spank me when she feels it's called for. Do I think it's too much? No when receiving punishment, I've done something wrong and she is trying to improve me. And you can't compare it to an erotic spanking, she really lays into my bottom.
    archedone

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  2. In accepting that at home my wife and partner would be in charge of all things domestic. She has made rules and they are rules that I have agreed to follow.

    Having said that I will confess that often when I have had a hard day or week at work and I come home I dont always feel i want to submit to any rules and certainly resent any punishment that might have been incurred by breaking those rules. It is at that moment I realize that I must push myself into acceptance on her terms.

    Since there is no sex attached to any punishment it can be difficult, but after the fact being held by her
    I always realize this is what I need. This is what makes me a better man!

    hank

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  3. lressem 474have to think any guy receiving real discipline often thinks it’s too much while waiting to be spanked and while getting it. If you don’t it’s not real discipline whatever you call it. This is especially true on those occasions your wife is punishing you and you think it’s unfair or you want to wait until later. My wife allows no discussion or defiance of any kind before a spanking but she will listen afterward and a few times she has apologized for spanking me unjustly. But even these times I have not felt it was too much after it’s over because I know she works hard to be a firm consistent disciplinarian and that means she gets to decide when it happens, where it happens and how much I get. There is no other way for it to work

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  4. Shortly before we married my wife said that there would be 2 short words that would form the basis of our marriage,sex and the cane.The former would be strictly limited,and the latter given frequently and severely.
    She was completely up to her word,After we returned to our honeymoon hotel,I was told to strip completely naked,and was told that this was going to be the consummation of our marriage,I was going to get 50 strokes of the cane,and sex would not happen until she was ready.She put the TV on loudly,and processed to beat me,bent over a chair,taking her time,nearly a minute between each stroke.I was in agony by the time she finished,my caning,but she had not finished,I was told to stand in the corner with my hands on my head,while she ran a cold bath,I had to sit in this and she produced a bath brush,which she used on my sore and bleeding bottom,and my penis.I was then sent to bed,after being told that sex was out of the question until she was ready,which would not be for a long time,says she was not going to have sex until she was ready to have children.I had to wait 3 years.ecticz

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  5. It may seem odd but i get my bare ass paddled about once or twice a yr--with in a very happy marriage--We are equal in all decision making and my wife is not a dominating person.My wife is very moral and religious and for certain conduct with my male friends I get my bare butt paddled and it sure hurts---I would not have to do this we could work things out another way --but it works for us Once i got my butt paddled things are once again great between us. We-- both know when a paddling has to settle things and there is no arguing or disagreement---It hurts but there is no issue of embarrassment --Other guys like me???

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  6. My wife has a cane and uses it, but only rarely. Much more often punishment is a night on the floor or a long hike with a backpack. These punishments give me time to reflect on my misbehaviour. A hard caning, while sometimes needed, so fries my brain that I can barely think for a long time afterwards.

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  7. Does it ever just become too much?
    No, because I realize that in looking at the entire picture it is what is required for a loving marriage. I only receive punishment spankings and there are the moments when I don’t think I can take any more of the spanking – it’s at that point I break down sobbing and pleading for forgiveness and promising to do better - my wife knows that exact point and my spankings end.
    Do you ever regret the decision to subject yourself to a full DD lifestyle?
    Some aspects are harder than others. There are times I regret that I cannot masturbate or have an orgasm during sex. Remaining chaste is probably the most difficult rule to follow. Not attending some functions with my friends can be disappointing as well, but I have agreed to follow the guidelines established and yield to my wife’s wishes.

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  8. No. My strict wife gives me a weekly punishment spanking with a leather strop paddle that leaves me bruised as a reminder not to masturbate and to keep my penis for her pleasure. I am more affectionate both on the days before my spanking and after it.

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  9. Nearly every spanking I receive from my wife is over a hundred swats and leaves me sobbing with a very red, sore bottom - even the weekly maintenance spankings. Nevertheless, in general, I find it to be a very satisfying experience (mostly before and after the spanking - less so as my wife is the act of blistering my behind). Still, there are times when my tells me to drop 'em and I am just "not in the mood". But I do, anyway, because this was what I asked for and agreed to - which is reason enough, and the price one pays for being a disciplined husband. The very first time that I realized that I really did not want to drop my pants and cross her lap, as I had just been ordered to do, was an interesting experience. I realized that I was obligated to do because of our agreement, but I also realized that I really had no choice - it was almost like being powerless. My wife had said that I was going to get my bottom paddled - and that was that - whether I liked it or not - or desired it or not. Interesting.

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